Day and Night
by shulesaddict77
Summary: He is always on her mind and she is just too tired to fight it anymore. Captain Swan.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello, my fellow Captain Swan fans!**

**Okay, this never happened to me before. To ship a couple without really knowing them. But one of my favorite authors, **_AMiserableLove,_** wrote these two awesome fics about them and just sucked me in. I googled Captain Swan and one look at Captain Hook and I was a goner. I haven't even seen Hook's episodes yet (I'm at S01E09), I've only seen a few fanvids on YouTube, but I couldn't resist to write this one-shot. My muse wouldn't give me any rest until I got it out of my head. The writers among you know what I'm talking about. :-)**

**I have no idea if this is OOC and it might not be normal to jump into a new fandom with an M-story and it really deserves the M-rating. But look at them! You can see the sexual tension crackling between them by only looking at pictures of them. I'm amazed that they haven't jumped each other yet! :-)**

**I hope you enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Sadly.**

* * *

**Chapter 1**

"What are you doing out here, love? So all alone?"

Emma almost groaned out loud. Of all the people it had to be him who found her. Alone. In the middle of the night, standing in the shadows of the trees. The man who was never far away from her mind. The man who had invaded her dreams. She couldn't deal with him right now. She didn't trust herself around him. Not when she was feeling so vulnerable, her emotions playing havoc with her body. She really didn't need the sexual tension that was always simmering between them added to the mix. Not now.

"Leave me alone, Hook."

"Why? Is my presence unsettling you?" Hook replied, his deep voice taunting her, sending a spiral of desire through her body.

"Ah, for God's sake." Emma snapped, trying to convince herself that the almost unbearable need to touch him would pass if he would just leave her alone. "Would you give me a rest?"

"Rest from what, love?" Hook asked, stepping closer, a glint of satisfaction flashing over his eyes as she involuntarily took a step back.

It wasn't his fault that she'd crossed his path when he'd decided to take a walk to clear his mind. It wasn't his fault that his mind was occupied with thoughts about her. Seeing her standing in the shadows had shot a surge of excitement through him. There had to be a reason that he stumbled upon her in the middle of the night.

"From you." Emma replied, raising her hand to stop him, not wanting him to come any closer.

"If I recall correctly we haven't seen each other in over two weeks." Hook said, deciding to actually give her the space she obviously needed to lure her into a false sense of safety. Because he had no intention to keep his distance. "Isn't that enough rest?"

"Not when my brain doesn't give me any." Emma muttered under her breath, a hardly audible groan escaping her mouth when she saw his cocked eyebrow, his mouth turning up in a smug grin, telling her that he'd heard her.

"What was that? I didn't hear you." Hook replied, his white teeth flashing in the darkness as his grin broadened and Emma had to clench her hands into fists to not give in to the urge to slap it off his face.

"You weren't supposed to hear anything."

"So am I in your thoughts then?" Hook asked, clearly amused and Emma just rolled her eyes, eliciting a chuckle out of him. "At night, too?"

If he wouldn't have been such an expert at reading her body language he would probably have missed it, the short stiffness of her body before she threw him an exasperated look. "Please! Don't flatter yourself."

"What are you dreaming about?" Hook asked, his voice turning low as he stepped closer, invading her personal space. "Do you dream of me, love? Do you dream about my lips brushing over your skin? Do you dream about my mouth against your thigh? Do you quiver with pleasure when you imagine me trailing a path of kisses down your body? Do your breasts ache with desire, the peaks growing hard with need?" His voice had taken on a husky tone and Emma shivered as he trailed his hook in a circle over one of her breasts, her nipples tightened as an inevitable response to his taunting touch.

"Stop it!" Emma shouted, pushing him back, cursing him inwardly for shooting a ball of heat straight down her spine, an aching sensation settling between her thighs. Emma sighed a breath of relief as he actually stepped back and she watched him suspiciously, awaiting his next move.

Hook knew he could have kissed her and she would have kissed him back. But he didn't want her to feel any reluctance, he wanted her to surrender to him. He wanted her to make the actual choice. He didn't want her to find any reason to accuse him afterwards that it was entirely his fault, that he'd forced himself on her, taking advantage of her shaken state.

"So you do dream about me." Hook said smugly, folding his arms over his chest.

"I once told Mary Margaret that if you think something is wrong it usually is." Emma replied, completely ignoring his statement.

She would not admit to him how aroused she woke up most of the mornings. She'd promised herself she would not think about the fact that she had the most erotic dreams about him, so erotic that it became harder and harder to find her way back to reality. For a split second she always asked herself if she shouldn't risk it, if she shouldn't give in to the temptation. But in the next second she was always calling herself a fool that she was even giving him more than a fleeting thought. Having sex with a pirate would be beyond insane.

"What do you think is wrong, love?" Hook asked, yanking her out of her thoughts and she met his eyes, his brilliant blue gaze being an almost unbearable temptation in itself and she felt as if she would fall under his spell if she would hold his gaze for much longer, so she averted her eyes, forcing herself to look over his shoulder.

"This. You. Me." Emma huffed out a frustrated breath, her eyes coming back to his face. "Us."

"It doesn't feel wrong." Hook stated, his husky voice making her shiver.

"God, what is it about you?" Emma groaned, throwing her hands up in frustration. "Why do I want you so much?"

"Because you shouldn't want me." He replied matter-of-factly.

"That easy, huh?" Emma replied, a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. Leave it to him to tell her with one simple sentence what the crux of the problem was.

"It usually is, Swan." He told her, shrugging one shoulder. "We tend to want those things the most that are forbidden."

"You aren't actually forbidden."

"But I _am_, Sheriff." He said and Emma realized that he had closed the gap between them again, his body now almost brushing against hers. "I'm the villain and you're the law."

He leaned down, his mouth only inches away from hers as he whispered. "I'm the forbidden fruit, love."

Emma exhaled a shuddering breath, his closeness making her body almost shake with anticipation and her eyes fluttered shut as his lips brushed over hers. His tongue swiped teasingly over her bottom lip and Emma groaned deep in her throat, opening her mouth for him. But suddenly he was gone and she snapped her eyes open, seeing him leaning back. She knew how wrong it was the moment she grabbed the lapels of his jacket and yanked him back but she couldn't stop herself.

Crushing her lips on his, a whimper escaped her as he wrapped his arm around her waist, pressing her against his lean and hard body. His tongue invaded her mouth, all passion and heat. He kissed her like she always imagined he would kiss. Hot and heavy, erasing every coherent thought out of her brain.

As they needed to come up for air, they stared at each other for a few seconds, their breathing labored, both slightly surprised about the intensity of this first kiss before a glint of mischievousness appeared in Hook's eyes and he shrugged out of his jacket and leaned down, spreading it out on the grass.

Emma looked down at his crouched form, raising an eyebrow mockingly. "Trying to be a gentleman again?"

"I've told you, I'm always a gentleman." He replied and her heart jumped into her throat as he stood up and pulled her into his arms.

"You're not a gentleman." Emma said, leaning back to look him in the eyes. "You are the very model of a pirate. All wicked and used to getting whatever you want."

"You might have a point." Hook said, a broad grin spreading out on his face. "Because you are here. In my arms. Seems like I'm getting what I want. Again."

She wanted to shove him back, wanted to show him that he couldn't have her but instead of shoving him away, she wrapped her hand around his neck and pulled him down to her, kissing him with all the frustration and all the anger she felt upon not being able to resist him.

Without breaking the contact he lowered them to the ground, aligning his body against hers as his lips trailed a path along her jaw, his teeth tugging gently at her ear lobe before he kissed his way down her neck, his tongue licking over her racing pulse.

"My mouth needs to compensate for the lack of my left hand." He mumbled against her skin.

They were in the middle of the park, someone could walk by any time but Emma didn't care as his mouth trailed along her collarbone, the cool metal of his hook scratching tentatively over her skin as he swiped away her blouse to reveal more naked skin to his hungry mouth.

"You don't mind if I rip this off you, love?" Hook asked, leaning back to have a good look on her face.

Emma was staring up at him, not really comprehending what he was asking but nodded nonetheless not even sure if he needed an affirmation and her breath caught in her throat as his hook slashed through the fabric barely touching her skin, his other hand grabbing the shirt and with a wicked smile on his face he yanked her blouse apart, the tearing of the fabric sounded loud in the silence that was surrounding them.

"Beautiful, darling." He breathed, his eyes roaming hungrily over her body as he leaned back on his heels.

"Hook?" Emma said, pushing herself up on her elbows.

"Yeah?" Hook replied, his eyes trailing a hot path along her chest until his eyes met hers.

"It's time for me to return the favor." Emma told him, pulling the torn blouse off her body and he raised one of his eyebrows in question.

But Emma just sat up without saying anything, forcing him to get up on his knees and she smiled broadly as she gripped his shirt tightly in her fists and yanked it open, the buttons flying across the lawn, her hands already busy discovering all the planes of his body, feeling satisfaction cursing through her body as she felt his muscles clench under her fingers.

"Are you in a bit of a hurry, love?" He drawled, shrugging out of the ruined shirt.

"Stop talking." Emma replied, pulling him down with her, a moan escaping her at the feel of his naked skin against hers.

"Then I have to find another use for my mouth." Hook murmured against her lips as his hand slipped under her back and snapped her bra open. Using his hook he pulled the bra down, growling deep in his throat as he stared down at her. "Yeah, looks like there is something that needs the attention of my mouth."

His mouth shot down to her breast and he circled one of her nipple with his tongue before he sucked it into his mouth and Emma arched her back, overwhelmed by the feelings his mouth elicited in her body.

His hand slipped down her body, his fingers opening her jeans with practiced ease before they disappeared between her legs, discovering her obvious arousal. Groaning loudly, Hook pulled his hand out of her pants, pressing it on her stomach as he leaned back, his fingers curling around the hem of her jeans.

"Can you give me a hand?" Hook asked, smiling broadly at the intended pun and Emma lifted her hips, pushing her jeans down her legs, slipping out of her shoes and a shivering breath escaped her as he pulled her panties down.

"Gods, you're beautiful."

There was something unsettling about lying naked in front of him and her heart was beating wildly in her chest as he slipped backwards and laid down between her legs. A silent battle raging through her as the urge to tell him no fought with the urge to feel his mouth on the most intimate part of her body.

But as his arms pressed her legs down, every thought of telling him to stop vanished in an instant and she closed her eyes as he felt his lips brushing along her thigh, his tongue licking a teasing path over her skin until he reached her center. His mouth closed over her and her hand shot down, her fingers clutching his hair as his tongue darted out and licked over her most sensitive spot, his mouth and tongue working her over until she thought she would burst into flames any second.

"Say my name!" His hoarse voice drifted up to her ears, his tongue flicking over her once more before he repeated. "Say it!"

"Hook." Emma whispered on a breath of air.

"No, my real name." Hook demanded, his breath hot on her skin. "Say it!"

"No!" The word burst out of her and a blush rose up her cheeks as she looked down to him, realizing how bizarre this whole situation was. He was lying between her legs, his mouth only inches away from her throbbing center and even in the pale moonlight she could see his lips glistening with her arousal. She wanted to say it, his name almost slipping over her lips but she refused to give him that much power. She'd already given him enough, letting him do what she'd hardly allowed any man before. Shaking her head, she clamped her mouth shut, gritting out through clenched teeth. "I'm not gonna say it. Just … please … let me … I can't … I just can't."

"Okay, love. I'm not gonna force you." Hook said softly, slipping along her body until he was completely covering her. "But tell me … what do you want?"

"You." Emma replied, her hand slipping under the waistband of his pants, wrapping her fingers firmly around him.

"Where?" Hook asked, pulling her hand out of his pants and pushing it over her head and before Emma could even realize what he was doing his one hand was wrapped around both of her wrists, pinning her hands to the ground.

"Over me. In me. Around me." Emma replied with a hoarse voice, arching her back to press her center against his length, hating herself for sounding so desperate but she couldn't help it. She wanted him. "Please, Hook. I need you. Don't make me beg."

He only looked down at her for what seemed like an eternity without moving a muscle, his eyes searching hers and Emma already believed that he would really make her beg as he suddenly stood up to get rid of his pants. Her breath hitched in her throat as she looked up at him, towering over her, completely naked. He was one gorgeous specimen of a man and she wanted him. Stretching her hand out, she begged him silently to join her.

"I'm not gonna be gentle." Hook said hoarsely as he lowered himself on her, lying down between her legs.

"I'm lying naked on the grass with a pirate who is a hairbreadth away from entering me." Emma replied dryly. "I'm not expecting gentleness. I expect you to live up to their reputation."

Holding her breath, she waited for him to show her how much he deserved to be called a pirate but even now he apparently couldn't resist teasing her as he slipped only a few inches into her before he retracted again, his tip barely brushing against her.

"No teasing games, Hook." Emma growled, slipping her hands around his waist, digging her fingers into his flesh. "Not now."

"You want me to show you the dark side?" A flicker of fear slithered through her as she looked into his eyes, darkened by unrestrained passion. A small voice in her head told her that unleashing him, giving him all the control, could be a mistake but she was beyond seeing any reason and she trailed one hand around his waist, over his stomach. Stopping directly above his heart, she met his hungry gaze as she whispered. "Yes."

"As you wish, love."

With the last word he slammed into her, taking her with barely contained brutality and Emma didn't know if she wanted to cry out in pain or with pleasure. A whirlwind of emotions raced through her body, his deep and hard thrusts making her forget everything around her and she wrapped her legs around his waist, giving him even deeper access to her body and a strangled moan slipped over her lips as he quickened his pace, plunging into her without mercy, drawing her with him towards the dark side as they spiraled out of control, their bodies taking over until they both tumbled over the edge.

Crashing down on her, he took some deep breaths, his face buried against her neck. He wasn't ready to face her yet. He hadn't been prepared for this. He wanted to show her that she wanted him as much as he wanted her. But he'd only wanted to give her his body and take hers. He hadn't been prepared for the possibility that he might lose a part of his heart.

But he was Captain Hook. There was no place for feelings other than hate and revenge in his life. He'd been on the dark side for too long. There was no way back for him. Killian Jones had died a long time ago. His good side had been erased the moment Milah's heart had stopped beating.

He should have stayed away from her. She didn't belong on the dark side. She wasn't supposed to be with him. She deserved a better man, not one who was as broken as he was.

Leaning back, he slipped out of her, gritting his teeth to not groan out loud as the loss of the intimate contact felt like someone had slammed a fist into his heart. She wasn't supposed to touch him, she wasn't supposed to touch his heart, she wasn't supposed to touch his dark soul. He wasn't supposed to feel anything beyond passion. This was supposed to be nothing else than sex to relieve the tension between them. How could he have known that she would be the first woman in like forever who caused a crack in the wall around his heart?

He jumped to his feet, searching for his clothes and putting them on with sharp movements, not even looking once at her as she stood up to get dressed herself. He wanted to give a smartass comment, wanted to show her that what just happened didn't mean anything. But somehow he wasn't able to.

As he shrugged into his jacket he looked up, meeting her eyes for the first time and sucked in a breath as he saw the determined look in them. She expected him to make fun of it, he could see how she prepared herself for the inevitable blow and he had to gulp hard to not tell her what he really felt.

"I'm not a good man, Emma." Her given name coming over his lips sent a shiver down her spine and Emma relaxed slightly as he saw the honesty shining in his eyes. She'd expected a cruel comment, she'd expected him to shrug it off. The tenderness in his voice almost brought tears to her eyes, the look in his eyes making her heart ache. "But for just a second when I was in you … I forgot who I am. But I can't be a better man. I don't have it in me." Raising his hand, he threaded his fingers through her hair, his thumb brushing over her cheek as he leaned down to press a soft kiss against her lips.

"I can't change. Not even for you." Stepping back, he gave her a last look before he turned around and left, walking briskly through the trees almost running as if he couldn't get away from her fast enough.

"Change?" Emma whispered as she stared into the shadows he'd just disappeared into and knowing with utmost certainty that no one was around to hear her she added softly. "I don't want you to change."

It had been nearly impossible to chase him out of her thoughts before, but after this night, after showing her how great of a lover he was, she didn't know how she should ever be able to get him out of her head. Because her body felt as if he had branded her, her skin prickling wherever his beard had abraded her and every single nerve ending in her body was still humming with pleasure.

He would follow her. In her thoughts. Now more than ever. Day and night.

But her greatest fear was that she would never forget how being in his arms had felt like the only place she truly belonged. She feared that one night with him, seeing this glimpse of what could be between them, might have completely ruined her for any other man.

* * *

**I would really love to hear your thoughts. Like I said, I've never written about any couple without actually having seen all their scenes. I blame **_AMiserableLove_** for getting me hooked (I love this pun) on this couple. Not that I needed much convincing. I'm a sucker for bad boys! :-) **

**I'm pretty sure I'm not done with them yet, but first I really need to catch up with the show before I write another story. But do not fear, I'm definitely joining the dark side. :-) **


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, I'm back. I'm up to date and ready to roll. :-)**

**As you can see I decided to continue this story. Not that I had a say in that matter. My muse made the decision for me but I have to admit it's going to be quite of a challenge. Because now, after I've seen all the episodes, I definitely need to write some flashbacks to explain how Hook and Emma got to the point where this story begins. :-)**

**Part of this chapter deals with the reaction of Emma's parents to the whole Hook thing because I love Snow and Charming (they are actually the only other characters I'm really interested in) and the unique situation they are in by being almost the exact same age than their daughter. I swear one day Josh is gonna kill me with this 'lonely tear trailing down his cheek' thing. Tugs at my heartstrings every time I see it. **

**There is not much Killian in this chapter. Sorry! But you'll get plenty of him in the next one. :-) **

* * *

**Chapter 2**

"Where have you been?"

Emma froze as she heard the accusing voice of her mother the moment she stepped over the threshold. She seriously needed to over think living with her parents. She shouldn't need to sneak into the apartment in the middle of the night. She was twenty-nine. She didn't need to answer to anyone. Henry was spending the night with Neal. It wasn't as if she had any obligation to be at home at a decent hour.

"Out!?" Emma replied, blinking into the sudden light when David stepped forward and flipped the switch. After her eyes had adjusted to the brightness she almost shook her head in disbelief as she saw her parents standing in front of her with matching disapproving looks on their faces. "You do realize that I'm not a teenager anymore, right?"

"But you live under our roof."

"Yeah, but that doesn't mean you can treat me as if I'm fifteen." Emma replied, shrugging out of her jacket and throwing it over a stool.

"What the hell happened to you?" David's sharp voice made her turn around confused. Both her parents were staring at her blouse and she suddenly realized that she had completely forgotten in which desolate state her shirt was in after Hook had ripped it apart.

"What happened?" David asked, stepping closer.

"David, please calm down." Mary Margaret said, holding him back.

"Look at her." David yelled, pointing towards their daughter and Emma turned around sharply, almost running towards her room.

"Don't you dare walk away now." David shouted after her. "Come back here, Emma."

"Let me talk to her, David." Mary Margaret said softly, pulling David back as he started towards Emma's room and David hesitated for a second before he realized that this was probably a topic Emma would only discuss with her mother, if at all.

"Okay."

~K&E~

Emma didn't even flinch when she heard the door open quietly behind her. She knew Mary Margaret would want to talk to her. She wouldn't let this slide. Not as her mother and definitely not as her friend.

"Who was it?"

"Who was what?"

"Did he hurt you?"

"No one hurt me." Emma replied brusquely, suppressing a wince as she turned around sharply. Hurt might be the wrong word but she would definitely have problems to get out of bed tomorrow. She could already feel her muscles protest against any movement.

Why on earth did her parents have to be awake when she got home? How the hell should she explain to them that her blouse was ruined because she had had incredibly hot sex with a pirate? That was definitely not something you could share with your parents. Not even if they were almost the same age than you.

"Emma? What happened?" Mary Margaret asked quietly and Emma looked up, realizing upon seeing the concerned expression on her mother's face that she had to give her some explanation.

"I was with a man. He didn't hurt me." Emma said, taking in a deep breath before adding. "You don't need to know more. This conversation is over."

Turning around she shrugged out of the ruined blouse, throwing it on her bed, hoping that her mother would just leave her alone. But before she could make a move or say anything a knock on the door startled them both and David stepped in, holding two glasses of wine in his hands.

"I thought you might wanna ..." His voice trailed off and Emma looked up, furrowing her brows as she saw the shocked expression on Mary Margaret and David's face.

"What?" Emma replied impatiently.

She just wanted to be alone. She was exhausted. As she rolled her shoulders tiredly to get the stiffness out of her neck a sudden pain shot through her right clavicle and she lifted her hand, hissing out a breath as her hand connected with her skin. Looking down disbelievingly, she discovered the reason why her parents looked this shocked. There was an angry red gash covering the right side of her chest, beginning at her clavicle and running down to her armpit as if someone had pulled a knife along her skin. Of course it hadn't been a knife. It had been a hook.

Her eyes flickered up to her parents, hoping that they wouldn't recognize the wound for what it was but one look at David told her that he was already connecting the dots and she flinched as he drew in a sharp breath, his eyes meeting hers accusingly.

"Seriously?" David said, his voice low with anger. "Hook? Are you out of your freaking mind?"

"David, get out." Mary Margaret said firmly, pushing her husband towards the door.

"I'm gonna kill him." David hissed, struggling against the grip of his wife.

"Get out." Mary Margaret pushed him out of the room and one look at the determined expression on her face made it clear that he couldn't argue with her, so he took one last look at Emma before he disappeared down the hallway.

Emma hunched her shoulders, preparing herself for another angry outburst as her mother closed the door behind David but she was completely taken by surprise by the next words out of her mother's mouth.

"Okay, can I just be a woman for a minute and then I'll be your mother?"

"As if I can stop you."

"You really didn't notice it when it happened?" Mary Margaret asked, pointing towards the wound.

"No, I didn't. Obviously." Emma replied. "Do you think I would have taken my shirt off in front of you if I'd known that he … that I had _this_?"

"So it was that good, huh?" Mary Margaret said, not able to hide a smile.

"Can I have my mother back?" Emma groaned.

"I still have forty seconds left."

"Okay, then go ahead."

"I wouldn't have pegged you for a woman who is into this stuff?"

"What stuff?"

"You know … pain?"

"God help me!" Emma rolled her eyes skywards, sighing heavily. "Okay, since you still have about thirty seconds left I'll tell you what you want to know but when I'm finished you have no time left to ask any other questions. Deal?"

"Deal!"

"Just for clarification's sake. I'm still talking to my friend not my mother, right?"

"Right."

"Okay. So no judging." Emma said and when Mary Margaret nodded she continued quietly. "It was the best sex of my life. I've never felt this way before with any man I've been with. So … reckless? Of course I didn't notice. I was beyond noticing anything. He was … it was all consuming. For a few minutes I forgot who I am, I forgot my problems, my fears. I forgot everything. The only thing that mattered was being with him. Feeling him."

"Oh my God!" Mary Margaret whispered but Emma just ignored her, wanting to get it all out.

"For a few minutes I forgot that he is a pirate, that he … that we … this … we can never work. But for a split second I wished he would take me to Neverland and we would leave everything behind. All responsibilities. Just living in the moment. I have to admit it was tempting. For a second." Emma turned around to her mother and smiled sadly. "Not everyone can live happily ever after. Not everyone is Snow White and Prince Charming."

"Emma, ..." Mary Margaret said softly but Emma interrupted her. "Time's up. Now give me the 'Are you insane?' speech."

"Are you okay?"

"Physically I'm fine." Emma replied. "But I have to admit I'm a little rattled. I wouldn't have thought that the sex would be so ..."

"Earth shattering?" Mary Margaret asked, a smirk tugging at the corner of her mouth.

"You don't sound like a concerned mother."

"It's the 'same age' thing." Mary Margaret shrugged one shoulder. "I can't help it."

"But it will pass." Emma said firmly. "I'm fine. Everything is going to be fine."

"You do realize that it's not going to be that easy."

"What do you mean?"

"Remember the conversation at Granny's when David was still trying to make it work with Kathryn?" Mary Margaret asked.

"What exactly are you referring at?"

"I really tried to get him out of my head but it didn't work." Mary Margaret replied.

"He is not in my head." Emma said, trying to convince herself as much as her mother.

"You can lie to me, Emma. But don't lie to yourself." Mary Margaret said softly. "Don't forget that we live together for quite some time now. I know you. You would have never slept with him if you wouldn't have thought about it for weeks. You wanted him."

"Yes, I did want him." Emma admitted reluctantly. "But one time was enough. It has to be enough."

"Just promise me one thing." Mary Margaret said. "Be careful. Don't forget how dangerous he is."

"It doesn't matter. It won't happen again."

"Are you sure? Because a passion like that is hard to ignore." Mary Margaret told her, her fingers hovering over the wound that covered the right side of Emma's chest. "Knowing that something is wrong doesn't make it any easier to resist."

"I just had a weak moment and it's passed now." Emma replied with utter conviction in her voice. "Don't worry. I have everything under control."

"Okay." Mary Margaret said, smiling softly. "I need to calm down your father now. Otherwise he might challenge Hook to a duel to safe your honor."

"And we wouldn't want that." Emma chuckled, slightly nervous. Because after all both men came from another world where duels weren't some ancient history but actually common practice.

"I'll take care of him." Mary Margaret reassured her. "You just take care of yourself."

"Thank you." Emma said quietly.

When the door closed behind her mother she stared at it for quite some time, her thoughts going back to the day on which this whole Hook thing probably started. The day she let what would happen to him matter to her. The day she couldn't keep her mouth shut. The day something definitely had shifted in their relationship. The day he'd turned up in Manhattan to kill Gold.

~K&E~

"_Why in such a hurry, love?"_

_Emma had no idea how he'd managed to get out of the basement but it didn't really matter. He was here. He found her. Better to deal with him now, even though the tone of his voice was telling her that he was furious. Bracing herself she took in a deep breath and turned around but she still wasn't prepared for the flip her stomach took at she got a good look at his face. _

_God, why did he look so utterly handsome? Why did the cut on his eyelid, the angry red bump on his right temple where she had hit him made him even more attractive? Damn, when did she turn into one of those women who melted into a puddle on the floor because of mesmerizing eyes and a face too handsome to be real?_

"_Hook!" She nodded in his direction, crossing her arms in front of her chest, missing the weight of her gun at her waist. She'd have felt much more comfortable with her weapon. After all Hook was unpredictable. No matter how much his attractiveness was taking a toll on her sanity, she never forgot that she was dealing with a pirate. "I see you got out of the basement. Impressive."_

"_I'm not here for some sweet talking, lass." Hook stepped closer and Emma had to remind herself to not show him any weakness. But the hard look in his eyes made it almost impossible to suppress her flight instincts. "You hitting me is getting a little out of hand."_

_Emma refused to step back, holding her ground as he came dangerously close. Suddenly he grabbed her arm and pulled her into a nearby alley and Emma almost shouted out for help. After all they were in the middle of Manhattan. Someone would come to her rescue if she would shout. But she wasn't at the point to back down yet. He wouldn't kill her in the middle of a city. Especially not since killing her would mean that he would have to deal with the wrath of her parents. No, killing her would only get in the way of his revenge and he would not risk that._

"_I've never hit a woman before. But you're really tempting me, love." Hook said in a low voice, pushing her back against the wall, putting his arm over her chest, pinning her against the cold concrete. "Stop interfering. I will kill him. I will get my revenge. You are only gonna get hurt, darling, if you keep stepping between me and the man who murdered my love." _

_Emma looked into his eyes and behind all the anger, all the fury she could see the hurt lingering and she cursed inwardly as she realized that he was getting to her. His bruised face just made things worse and she pushed against him, surprising him with the suddenness of her attack and he stumbled a few feet back, looking at her slightly baffled as she went after him, giving him another push against his chest as she almost shouted._

"_Did you ever stop and think about what this whole revenge thing is doing to you? You are not living. This is not living, Hook. What would Milah say to this? I'm sure she wouldn't approve what had become of you."_

"_How would you know?" Hook hissed. "You didn't know her."_

"_I don't have to. I'm a woman, Hook."_

"_What is that supposed to mean?"_

"_You know, I can see it."_

"_See what?"_

"_The remnants of the love you shared. I can still see it in your eyes." Emma said calmly, continuing even when she saw his eyes narrowing dangerously. "Even three hundred years weren't able to erase it completely out of your heart. I can only see the shadow now but if she loved you as much as you apparently loved her, and I'm sure she did, she wouldn't want your life to be like this. She would want you to live. Because if a woman truly loves a man all you wish is for him to be happy. You are not happy, Hook. If she could see you right now it would break her heart. _

"_Who are you to tell me what I should and shouldn't do, Sheriff?"_

"_You're right. It's none of my business."_

"_Damn right! So stop interfering."_

"_I don't know why I care, Hook." Emma stepped back, a sudden wave of tiredness overwhelming her. Would her life ever get easier? "I know I shouldn't. I should probably just let Gold kill you and put you out of your misery. Maybe there is something like an afterlife and you can be reunited with Milah. Maybe this is the only way to give you some peace."_

"_That's all I'm asking for."_

"_But what if you succeed? What if you kill Gold? What is left when you get your revenge? Did you ever think about that?" Emma asked, still trying to get through to him despite knowing that she was probably wasting her breath. "I know how it feels to be consumed by rage and anger. Believe me, I do. And I know it's a lot easier to give in to that rage than to turn away and walk in the other direction. But you've spent three hundred years chasing one man. Don't you think it's time to let go? It's not worth it, Hook. I think right now you still have a chance to be the man you once were."_

"_You have no idea what a man I once was."_

"_True. But Hook?" Emma said, waiting for him to meet her eyes again before she added quietly. "I can still see him. The man Milah fell in love with. He is still in you. Somewhere. Don't lose him."_

~K&E~

She'd had turned around and hadn't looked back. She'd been too drained to care any longer. She had had enough on her plate without adding a broken pirate to the mix. But her mother was right. It was easier said than done. Because forgetting him, shoving him out of her head would be more challenging than she cared to admit.

Emma stepped to the window, looking out over the dark town. Wrapping her arms around her waist, she leaned against the frame and for the first time she let herself think about all the things that had happened since she met him, let the feelings he'd caused in her emerge to the surface, examining them, hoping that looking at them closely would make it easier to get him out of her head.

She knew leaving him up on the beanstalk would destroy any trust they might have been able to build. But what was she supposed to do? He was Captain Hook. She couldn't afford it to trust him. Too many people in her life had betrayed her. But he had touched something inside her, she'd wanted to believe him, to believe in him. After all the fact that he'd been able to read her that easily had been quite unsettling.

The words Aurora had spoken to her, they had stirred something up in her. A small flicker of hope had risen in her as she'd heard the words she'd thought Hook had spoken. She'd called herself a fool hours later for even believing for a second that the words might be true. As she had been standing in the cage, trapped behind the wooden bars, watching him walk away with Cora. His words had stung. She hadn't wanted them to have any impact on her but for a brief second as he'd told her that he wouldn't have left her behind she'd wondered if she should have trusted him.

She'd drawn no small pleasure out of beating him in front of the portal, smacking the compass against his forehead had filled her with extreme satisfaction. She'd wanted to hit him. She'd wanted to hurt him for making her feel something, for making her question her own judgment.

She'd thought they had left them behind in the Enchanted Forest. She'd thought that she would never see him again and she'd tried to forget him. What had turned out to be extremely difficult. He'd haunted her in her dreams. His words ringing in her ears, his eyes following her everywhere.

But she would have forgotten him eventually if he hadn't showed up in Storybrooke. If looking down at his broken body hadn't shot a surge of concern through her. She hadn't wanted to be concerned about him. Pressing her hands against his broken ribs had been the only way she could keep her distance because seeing him lying in the hospital bed all battered and bruised, his eyes twinkling up at her as he'd engaged her in some sexual innuendo made her question her sanity. Because for one brief moment, for the flicker of one second she had been tempted. She had been tempted to take him up on his offer.

No matter how hard she tried to keep her walls up, he always managed to worm his way in. She didn't want to admit it but a part of her understood exactly why he was doing what he was doing. In a strange way she felt connected to him and so far she hadn't found a way to sever this connection. Of course having wild sex in the middle of the park didn't help either. Of course it was only making it worse.

Gold had been wrong. She didn't want a second chance with Neal. Maybe a few months ago she would have wanted one. Before she met _him_. But when Gold told her that she had lied to Henry to protect herself from getting hurt again, the man popping up in her head hadn't been Neal. No, she hadn't seen Neal's face flashing up in front of her eyes, she'd seen _his_ face. _His_ blue eyes, _his_ mouth curled up into one of his infuriating smirks. No, it wasn't Neal who made her heart beat faster. It was a freaking pirate.

But it had to stop. She needed to get a grip on her feelings for him. Her heart couldn't beat faster for him. It just wasn't possible. She would not fall for a man again who would inevitably hurt her. Because falling for Hook could only end in heartache and she had had enough of that. No, she'd sworn herself that she would never ever fall in love again and she would not let him change her mind.

~K&E~

Mary Margaret leaned against the wall, watching her husband pacing back and forth through the living room. He was worried about Emma. Of course he was. It wasn't as if she wasn't concerned herself. Hook was a dangerous man. There was no denying that. But Emma could take care of herself. They might be her parents. But she was almost thirty and as much as they wanted to protect her, their daughter was all grown-up. She was old enough to make her own choices. But looking at her husband she knew it wouldn't be easy to convince him to stay back.

"David?" She said softly, stepping into the living room.

David rushed towards her, grabbing her arms. "Is she okay?"

"She is fine." Mary Margaret tried to reassure him and she felt him relax a little, not much but it was a start.

"Hook? How can she? With Hook?" David's voice grew louder and Mary Margaret pulled him towards the couch, pushing him down, putting her hand on his knee.

"You weren't there when they first met." She said quietly.

"What is that supposed to mean?" David snapped, fidgeting on the couch as if he wanted to jump up to resume his pacing.

Mary Margaret grabbed his hands between hers, waiting for him to meet her gaze before she continued. "There was something between them right from the beginning."

"You mean love at first sight?" David asked incredulously. "You want to tell me that she fell for him despite him being a pirate."

"We didn't know that he is a pirate. Not at first." Mary Margaret argued. "But no, I don't think she fell in love with him instantly. I'm not even sure if she is in love with him now. But ... there was a connection, right from the beginning. I don't know how to describe it, maybe kind of a mutual understanding?"

"For God's sake he is a pirate driven by revenge." David hissed. "What the hell does she see in him?"

"Well, for a start … he is insanely handsome."

"You're kidding, right?"

"No, actually not." Mary Margaret said. "He is extremely attractive. You can't deny that."

"So I just have to be okay with the fact that my daughter is jumping into bed with every man who looks hot?"

"You should know her better by now, David."

"So she is in love with him then?"

"We of all people should know that two people actually could be 'meant to be' together. No matter the circumstances. Maybe they were meant to find each other."

"No way!" David said, jumping up from the couch. "Emma is not meant to be with Captain Hook."

"The heart wants what it wants and if she wants him ..." Mary Margaret tried to argue but he interrupted her, his voice hard with determination. "She doesn't want him."

"How do you wanna know what she wants?" Mary Margaret asked quietly.

"Snow, she is our daughter. She can't be in love with a pirate." David said and she could hear the desperation in his voice. "He is not a good man. He is not the kind of man I want for my daughter."

"It's not our decision."

"He will ruin her." David leaned against the kitchen island, burying his face in his hand and Mary Margaret stood up, walking towards him. Cupping his face with her hand she turned his head around, smoothing her fingers over his lips.

"David, she is falling for him." She said calmly. "She is fighting it but I can see it."

"Maybe it's just a fling?" David asked hopefully.

"I can see myself in her."

"What do you mean?"

"She is trying to forget him as desperately as I tried to forget you." Mary Margaret explained.

"So you are telling me she won't forget him? No matter what we do or say?"

"She is a grown woman and no matter how much we want to protect her, she needs to make her own choices."

"But Hook?" David said in a pleading voice, still not able to accept the fact that his daughter might be in love with a pirate. "How can she fall for him?"

"Maybe because he is as scarred as she is. She doesn't have to explain anything to him. He just understands."

"He is a pirate, Snow." David repeated,

"He won't hurt her, David." Mary Margaret said confidently. "At least not physically."

"Yeah, I could see that." David huffed out a sarcastic breath.

"That's something completely different and you know it."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? Because it doesn't work. I don't want to think about him having his hand and hook all over ..." David stopped mid-sentence as they heard the door to Emma's room open.

"I just wanted to ..." Emma held up the two wine glasses, both empty now. She hadn't even realized that she was drinking the wine until both glasses were empty. She just wanted to put them in the sink. She hadn't expected her parents to still be awake.

Mary Margaret watched David warily. She didn't know what he would do next but as she saw the anger change into concern on his face she knew he wouldn't yell at her. He released the death grip he had had on her hand and walked slowly towards their daughter who looked like a frightened animal who could jump back into the woods any moment.

Emma's eyes widened in surprise as David lifted his hand and caressed her cheek, pulling her into an embrace and she wrapped her arms around his waist instinctively, burying her face in his shoulder. It still felt slightly uncomfortable to be in his arms, she still had problems to wrap her head around the fact that he was her father but nonetheless she was glad that he was apparently not mad at her anymore.

"I love you, Emma." David said quietly. "I can't stand it to see you get hurt."

"I'm not gonna get hurt, David." Leaning back, she looked up into his face. "There is nothing between Hook and me."

"I would really like to believe that."

"You can." Emma replied, stepping out of his embrace. "Whatever it was ... it's over. I got it out of my system and I'm fine now. Stop worrying, okay?"

"I'm your father, Emma. I'll never stop worrying." David said and Emma gave him a soft smile before she turned around, walking back to her room. "Good night."

"Good night, Emma." David and Mary Margaret said simultaneously.

Mary Margaret stepped towards her husband, slipping under his arm and he pulled her into his side, pressing a kiss against her forehead. She almost didn't hear him as he asked, barely above a whisper. "It isn't over, is it?"

"I don't think so."

* * *

**As much as I enjoy writing stories about Nick and Jess from New Girl I really missed writing stories with a darker touch and Emma and Killian definitely give me the opportunity to delve into the darkness. I love it! :-)**

**I don't like to admit it but I think our ship is doomed. Don't get me wrong I'm sure we'll get some action at some point but I'm pretty certain it's only going to be a hot affair because as much as it pains me to say it but I think that the producers will eventually go down the 'boring' path and let Emma end up with Neal. I do hope my gut feeling turns out to be wrong though. Did I already mention how much I dislike Neal? Maybe I'm too pessimistic or maybe I'm just preparing myself for the worst case scenario. I don't know.**

**So I just have to give them their happy ending and hope for the best, right? :-)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Just a reminder, this story is rated M and it's rated M for a reason. It's not only because of the first chapter. The rest of this story will be M as well. Consider yourself warned! :-)**

**This is insane. I thought if I just would get the second chapter out of my head I could catch up on all my other TV shows, but no. Killian didn't stop pestering my muse. Let me tell you, he really doesn't like being neglected. He continued to poke my muse until I just gave in and wrote this chapter to shut him up. :-)**

**Oh, and just FYI my 'normal' chapters have a length around 2000 words but the moment I sit down and start to write a chapter for this story it is always getting out of hand. Yep, it's official. I'm completely obsessed with Captain Swan.**

**But enough with the rambling! I promised you plenty of Killian in the last chapter, right? Then here you go! May I present to you … our beloved Captain!**

* * *

**Chapter 3**

Two days. He'd only lasted two days. He'd wanted to stay away from her. He'd tried to just forget what had happened. But how should he forget? She had given him everything, holding back nothing and it was as if she was branded into his memory. He could swear that he could sometimes still taste her, that her smell was lingering in the air surrounding him, assaulting him at the most impossible times. It was kind of embarrassing to admit that only thinking about her laying underneath him, writhing in pleasure, could make him rock hard in seconds.

The sex had been borderline violent. She had asked him, almost begged him, to lose control and for a few minutes he had, taking her without caring if he would hurt her or not. He might be a pirate but he'd always shown utmost respect to women and treated them with the respect they deserved. But Emma, this blond vixen, made him forget that he was actually a gentleman. Because he was one, most of the times, even if she didn't believe him to be one.

Now he was wandering through Storybrooke in the middle of the night, trying to get her out of his head and without even realizing where his feet were taking him, he was suddenly standing in front of the Sheriff's station, looking through the window. She was sitting at her desk, shuffling through some papers and he stepped back into the shadows, not able to pass up the opportunity to watch her without her knowing that he was there.

After he'd found his way back to Storybrooke, what had taken him longer than he would ever admit, he'd gone immediately to pay her a visit. It had taken him days to find his way back from Manhattan after they'd stolen his ship. Days in which he had too much time to think. But it wasn't the next step of his revenge that was occupying his mind, it was the words Emma had spoken to him.

He wasn't the cold blooded killer she thought he was. He had a heart, he could feel compassion. He'd just forgotten about it. But her words had caused a crack in his armor. It hadn't been the only crack she'd caused. The more time he spent with her the more cracks appeared in the wall he'd built around his heart.

Leaning against the wall, his eyes still locked on her figure behind the window, he'd remembered what had occurred as he'd found her after he'd gotten back from Manhattan, as he'd confronted her about leaving him behind. Again.

~K&E~

"_You've bested me again, Sheriff?"_

_She stopped abruptly, turning around sharply. She didn't even look surprised as if she was expecting him to show up. _

"_Yet again, you've left me tied up. This is really getting to be a nasty habit of you. I told you I wouldn't complain if you would tie me up for some more pleasurable activities."_

"_Yeah, as if that would ever happen." Emma replied before she started to walk away from him again but he wouldn't let her get away that easily and fell into step beside her. _

"_Who was sailing the ship? It wasn't you, was it?"_

"_No. It was a … friend." Emma said shortly._

"_A friend?" Killian could hear the slight hesitation before she said the last word. Curiosity rose up in him and he put his hand on her arm, stopping her. "What friend?"_

_But before she could give him an answer, a boy came around the corner, stopping dead in his tracks as his gaze fell on them. __"__Mom?"_

"_This is your lad then?" Killian kneeled down in front of him, stretching out his hand. "I'm Killian Jones, better known as Captain Hook. Nice to ..."_

"_Get your hands off my son."_ _A voice suddenly cut through the air and Killian turned his head, staring at the man who was rushing towards them._

"_You look familiar.__" Killian said slowly, standing up from his crouched position._

"_Don't you dare touch him." The man growled before he turned towards Emma. "Are you insane, Emma? Why are you talking to him? He is Captain Hook."_

"_Do I know you?" Killian asked, furrowing his brows. He knew this man. He just didn't know from where._

"_Step away from my family, Hook."_

_Something in the other man's eyes stirred up a memory in him and he narrowed his eyes dangerously as a younger version of the man standing in front of him flashed up in his brain and he hissed. "Pan!"_

"_It's been a while, Hook."_

"_Wait a second." He could see Emma stiffen in surprise out of the corner of his eye but his gaze never left Pan. "Pan? As in Peter Pan? You are Peter Pan?"_

"_I should have known." Killian growled. "You're the only one who knows how to sail my Jolly Roger!"_

"_You keep your hand and hook of Emma and Henry or I swear I'll kill you and this time I will really kill you."_

"_Neal!" Emma said loudly, grabbing Pan's arm and he turned around sharply. "This is between Hook and me, Emma."_

"_Neal, your son is standing right beside you."_

"_It's him." Killian suddenly stepped back, realization hitting him square in the chest. This man was the one man she once loved? Peter Pan? "He is the one, isn't he?"_

"_What is he talking about?" Pan asked impatiently._

"_Nothing." Emma replied, her eyes boring into his. Killian could see a flicker of fear flashing in her eyes. She was afraid he would tell her secret, that he would blurt it out in his blunt way. And she was right. Under normal circumstances he would. But these were not normal circumstances. Nothing was normal when it came to this woman. _

"_Everything okay here?" Emma's shoulders sagged in relief as her father came around the corner. _

_Killian almost groaned out loud. He'd wanted to talk to Emma alone. He didn't want an audience. He definitely didn't want her father to show up. The one he'd hit over the head to get his hook back. Prince Charming was probably one of the many people on a long list who wouldn't shed one tear if Rumpelstiltskin would kill him._

"_David, can you please take Henry to Granny's? We'll be with you in a minute."_

"_Emma I'm not ..."_ _Her father stepped closer, putting himself between him and Emma. Killian gritted his teeth. He wasn't the one Emma needed protection from. He wasn't the one who would hurt her. But apparently Charming had no idea that Pan was the bigger threat. Pan wouldn't do her bodily harm, but he'd inflicted pain that was much worse. Killian was sure that he was the one who hurt Emma so much that she wasn't capable of trusting anyone. He had been the one who had betrayed her. _

"_David, I've got this." Emma's calm voice yanked him out of his thoughts as she addressed her father. "Just take Henry with you."_

"_No." Henry said emphatically. "I wanna stay."_

"_Henry, please." Emma said, grabbing the hands of her son between hers, her focus solely on him. "I need to handle this alone, okay?"_

"_But they are Peter Pan and Captain Hook." Henry said excitedly, his eyes flickering back and forth between Pan and him._

"_Exactly. I don't want you anywhere near them." Emma said firmly. "Who knows what they want to do to each other." _

"_Henry, come on. Let's go." David said, putting his arm around Henry's shoulder to pull him towards Granny's. Throwing a last look over his shoulder, David said quietly. "I'm not okay with you being alone with these two. You shouldn't ..."_

"_I know." Emma interrupted him, giving him a soft smile. "Thank you."_

_As Killian turned his gaze back to Pan, he saw the furious expression on his face. _

"_Leave Emma alone, Hook."_

"_I don't answer to you, Pan. You can't give me any orders. If I want to talk to her, I'll talk to her. You are not her keeper."_

"_She is the mother of my child."_

_Killian was surprised about the flicker of jealousy that rushed through his body. This was the man her heart belonged to and she would always be connected to him. She'd born him a child._

"_But she is not your woman." He snapped back. The words 'She is mine' almost slipping over his lips._

"_Would you just stop it? I'm standing right here. And just to make one thing clear. I don't belong to anyone than myself." Emma yelled but Killian felt hot fury surging through his blood. _

_His old enemy was the one man Emma had ever had deeper feelings for. The golden boy, Peter Pan. He stepped towards him, closing the distance between them, the urge to hit him almost unbearable. His hand closed to a fist and he saw Pan's hands clenching into fists as well and Killian's body tensed in anticipation of a fight. But suddenly Emma stepped between them, shoving her hands against his and Pan's chest to keep them apart. _

"_God, would you just turn down the testosterone."_

"_Testosterone?" The foreign word made him stop his staring contest with Pan and he turned his head towards her, raising an eyebrow, trying to figure out what the meaning of the word could be._

"_I'm so freaking tired of explaining everything to you." Emma huffed out, throwing her hands up in frustration. But despite her obvious annoyance she continued her explanation. "It's a hormone. It's a chemical substance in your body. It's what makes you a man."_

"_What?" Killian asked. This realm was confusing the hell out of him sometimes. He had no idea what she was talking about._

"_It's what makes you do those stupid things. You know, like wanting to mark your territory. So let me just repeat it again, so that you both get it into your thick heads. I don't want you ..." Her finger pointed towards Pan before she turned around and pointed her finger towards him. "... or you and if you two would be the last men on earth and I needed to choose one of you to keep the human race from extinction … Guess what, I would just let the damn world go to hell. Got it!" _

~K&E~

A smile tilted up his mouth as he remembered this conversation from a few weeks ago. It still wasn't sitting well with him that Peter Pan had been or still was her true love. But he didn't draw a small pleasure out of the fact that she had chosen him after all. Not for procreation of course. But she had been his. His for one wild ride. Maybe he just needed to remind her of it. Maybe he would just push her buttons a little bit. It was always fun to tease her and he could need a distraction.

His head swirled around as he saw the lights going out in her office and when she stepped out of the building he'd made up his mind. It was time for a little teasing.

"Anywhere important to be, Swan?" She startled when he'd addressed her as she was walking by. "You know I can offer you my services. Whatever you need."

"I don't need anything from you."

"Are you sure?" Killian asked, stepping out of the shadows to block her path. "It seemed you enjoyed my services the last time around."

Emma hated her body for reacting immediately to his voice, hated it for reminding her of the hour they'd spent in the middle of the park, having incredible sex. Hating herself for even calling it incredible. He was just a man and it had just been sex. There wasn't one reason for her to completely lose her head like this. Beside the fact that the sex had been mindblowingly fantastic, of course.

"What do you want, Hook?" Emma asked exasperated, not willing to fall into the trap of addressing his so called 'services'. He didn't need any encouragement anyway. She was pretty sure he had some more sexual innuendos up his sleeve. He always had.

He'd intended to give her a witty remark, intended to rile her up even more, loving the passion that burned out of her eyes but when he opened his mouth something completely different came out of it, something he didn't know he was thinking until he heard it out loud. "I want you."

He was almost as shocked about the words as she apparently was, staring at him with her mouth wide open, her eyes clouded with confusion. He had sworn that he would keep his distance before what he felt for her would get much more complicated. But he couldn't stay away. He couldn't deny how much he wanted her. "Emma?"

But she just turned around and walked away from him and he grabbed her shoulder, wanting to pull her around, not willing to let her go but she flinched under his hand, hissing out an expletive in pain. He lifted one eyebrow curiously, searching her eyes for an answer, but she was staring to the ground, her hand covering her shoulder.

"What happened there?" Killian asked, surprised about the protectiveness filling his body. Whoever hurt her, he wanted to hit him for causing her pain.

"You happened." Emma snapped.

"What?"

"Yes!" Emma replied harshly. The confused expression on his face made her even more furious and she shoved her hands against his chest, pushing him backwards into a nearby alley. "You and your damn hook."

"I … what are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about _this_!" Emma shouted, yanking her blouse and jacket away from her shoulder, showing him the wound he'd inflicted on her.

"Bloody hell." Killian said surprised, raising his hand but halting the movement when she stepped back. "Are you … are you alright, love?"

"Stop calling me that."

"I … it wasn't my intention to hurt you, Emma." He said quietly, the fact that he'd hurt her without even realizing it scared the hell out of him. "I'll … I'll better go."

"No, you're not." Emma growled, grabbing his arm and swirling him back towards her. "You Goddamn son of a bitch. You're not running away now."

"But I ..."

"What? I rendered the big Captain Hook speechless?" Emma scoffed. "That's a first I suppose."

"You are one bloody infuriating woman." Killian replied angrily.

"I? You are the one who is bloody infuriating." Emma snapped. She really wanted to forget him, she never wanted to feel like this ever again. But she couldn't help it. The moment she'd heard his voice she knew where this would lead. It was inevitable. There was nothing she could do to stop it even if she would have wanted to stop it. "Coming here to tell me that you want me just to turn around and walk away the next second? I should have just let you leave but there is one tiny problem."

"What tiny problem?" Killian hissed, his mouth set into an angry line, his eyes dark with fury and Emma's heart started to beat faster as her eyes flickered down to his mouth and back up to his eyes. She could feel the exact moment the atmosphere between them shifted, the moment when the anger turned into passion. Just like that. In a matter of seconds the tension between them thickened and her body leaned towards him on its own volition, her mouth stopping only a hairsbreadth away from his lips as she let out on a sigh. "I want you, too."

A jolt of electricity shot through her as he growled deep in his throat a second before his mouth pressed against hers. His hand went into her hair, his fingers digging almost painfully into her skin as his mouth devoured hers and she let out a moan as her back hit the wall hard as he pushed her into it, shoving his body against hers, a ball of hot desire shooting into her stomach as she felt his length pressing into her hip. Who had she been trying to convince? She'd never stood a chance. Her hands slipped under his jacket, tugging his shirt out of his pants, sighing softly as her fingers made contact with his naked skin.

"Gods, Swan." Killian wrenched his mouth away from hers, leaning his forehead against hers, breathing hard. Her fingers were playing over his skin and he didn't know if he would be able to hang on to his control this time. This woman was driving him crazy. Her fingers skimmed along the waistband of his pants and he sucked in a breath, croaking out hoarsely. "I need you. Gods, I need to be in you. Now."

She didn't give him an answer, her fingers already busy with opening his pants and his hand shot down to the buttons of her jeans, fumbling with her belt and he cursed loudly. "Bloody hell. Why are the women in this realm wearing trousers? Skirts are much easier to get out of the way."

The low chuckle out of her throat shot straight to his groin and he leaned forward, taking her ear lobe between his teeth, biting down hard before he pressed a hungry kiss against the soft skin directly beneath it. "I swear, Swan, if you aren't out of this bloody trousers in a second I'm gonna destroy them."

Without saying anything she slipped out of her shoes and shoved her pants down her legs, stepping out of them quickly. His hungry eyes were roaming over her bare skin, stopping at the flimsy piece of underwear she was wearing.

"Don't rip it." Emma said hoarsely, apparently reading his mind. "You've already destroyed one of my favorite shirts."

"So you have a fondness for this little piece?" Killian asked, cocking one eyebrow, lowering his hook, slipping it carefully under her panties. He could hear her breath hitch in her throat and his eyes burned into hers, his mouth twitching up in a cocky smirk as he tilted his hook, stretching the fabric.

"Too bad." He growled and with one jerk he ripped it apart, swallowing the groan that escaped her lips with his mouth as he pulled her into his arms.

The open lapels of his pants were scratching over her skin and only feeling the cool leather against it almost made her come. Impatiently she shoved her hands beneath the waistband of his pants, shoving them down, taking his undies with them. Suddenly he lifted her up in the air and she had no idea how he managed to do it with only one hand but her brain was too fuzzy to follow that thought and she wrapped her legs around his waist, eager to feel him inside of her.

She could feel him against her entrance and one moment later he rammed into her, taking her hard and fast. For a second she wondered what had gotten into her. She was the Sheriff of this town, everyone in this town knew her and she was pinned against a wall while a pirate pounded into her. What if they got caught?

But then he altered the angle of his thrusts, hitting her even deeper and all she could concentrate on was the feeling of him slipping in and out of her, the jolt of pure pleasure that shot through her every time he buried himself deep in her.

She knew it was wrong but she didn't care. The waves of passion were crashing down on her and she grabbed his head, yanking him down, her mouth taking his hungrily, greedily. Their tongues clashed together, fighting for dominance. His thrusts became faster and she could feel the beads of sweat covering his face under her fingers, could taste the saltiness on her lips and she leaned back, looking up into his eyes and he stopped abruptly, looking down at her questioningly.

But Emma only shook her head, her fingers swiping away the sweat from one of his eyebrows and she could feel him stiffen under her caress. The sudden tenderness that was lingering between them, closing up her throat. She could feel him hard and pounding inside of her and she wrapped her hands around his neck, pulling him down until her lips brushed his ear.

"You better finish what you've started, pirate." Emma whispered, her voice thick with passion. "You don't wanna leave me unsatisfied, do you?"

He leaned back then, flashing her a cocky grin. "Of course not, milady."

With the last word he plunged into her, his eyes darkened with desire upon hearing the startled groan that escaped her. "Is that what you wish for, princess?"

Opening her eyes slowly she stared up at him, taking in his handsome features, mashing down the unwanted feelings he stirred up in her. "Yeah. But I want more. Much more."

"Then I will give you more."

He started slowly, making her feel every inch of him as he slipped in and out of her, eliciting an overload of sensations in her body. Emma thought she would lose her mind any second as he was pushing her closer and closer, his pace getting faster and faster as he was giving her more and more and more until she exploded around him, the orgasm slamming into her, taking her breath away. Her body quivered uncontrollably in his arms and she could feel him thrusting into her a few more times before he followed her, spilling his release into her.

~K&E~

Like the last time they were getting dressed in silence and Emma asked herself if it would always be that way. If they would always feel a little overwhelmed by the intensity with which they came together. What they were doing was insane. But it was the good kind of insanity. The kind that left you completely satisfied. The kind that made you crave for more.

But it was also the kind of insanity that made you forget the most important things. Shaking her head about her own stupidity, she shoved her blouse into her pants, closing her belt before she looked up. Clearing her throat, she stepped towards him, putting her hand on his arm. "Aehmm, Hook?"

"Yeah?" He asked, turning around to face her.

"I know I'm a little late for asking this question but ..." Emma trailed off, feeling slightly uncomfortable to continue.

"What question?"

"I'm on the pill so we don't have to worry ..." Emma continued but got interrupted by his surprised voice. "On the pill? What does that mean?"

"Oh." Emma let out a soft chuckle, shaking her head slightly. "Sometimes I forget that you are from a completely different world."

"What pill, love?" Killian stepped forward and Emma could hear the concern in his voice. "Are you sick?"

"No, I'm not sick." Emma reassured him, searching her brain for an explanation he might understand. "See, we women here in this world can enjoy the advantages of modern medicine."

"But if you're not sick why are you taking pills?"

"I'm taking the pills so I can't get pregnant." Emma told him, realizing that the blunt way would be the best.

"There are pills for that?" Killian asked baffled. This world was sure full of surprises.

"Yes, but there are not protecting me against diseases." Emma added, watching him seriously. "So tell me, Captain. Do I have to worry? After all you are a pirate and I doubt you ever even heard of safe sex."

"Safe sex?" If the topic wouldn't be so serious she would have burst into laughter upon seeing the confused expression on his face.

"Do you have some nasty thing like Syphilis or something like that?" Emma asked bluntly. Bluntness seemed to be the only way to make him understand the importance of her question.

"Oh, I see." Killian said, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "No. I don't think so. It's been a while."

Emma sighed relieved before she suddenly realized what his words might imply. "Oh God, please don't tell me that I … I'm not the first woman since ..." Her sharp intake of breath and her stumbled words made him look at her surprised and it took him a few seconds until he realized what she was trying to ask him.

"No. There had been a few in between." Killian said, smiling softly. "I'm not a saint. Three hundred years would have been a bloody long time to go without. Wouldn't you agree, love?"

"Yeah, it would have been."

"So, no worries." Kilian continued. "You aren't the first woman I've bedded since Rumpelstiltskin's wife. Come to think of it. She was Henry's grandmother, wasn't she?"

Emma's eyes widened in surprise and he could see a flash of shock crossing her eyes. He couldn't help the laugh that rolled over his lips as she apparently realized the weirdness of their current situation.

"Ahh, I see this thought never crossed your mind." He chuckled, his voice turning into a challenge as he continued. "So are you running away now, love? Is this too much for you to handle?"

A part deep inside of her sighed out a breath of relief that he'd given her a challenge. Because no matter how weird she might find the fact that he'd once shared his bed with Henry's grandmother she couldn't shy away from a challenge, could she?

"No, it's not too much to handle." Emma said defiantly. "You think this small … inconvenience would make me miss out on amazing sex?"

"Amazing sex?" Killian asked, his mouth curling up into a smug grin and he put a hand over his heart, bowing slightly. "Thanks for the compliment, milady. I knew you would enjoy it."

"As if you don't enjoy it." Emma huffed, rolling her eyes about his theatrical behavior.

"Oh, I enjoy it very much." Killian replied, stepping closer. His hand reached up and his fingers brushed her hair behind her ear, his thumb caressing her cheek as he continued with a low voice. "I enjoy our fights. All of them."

"All of them?"

"We are sparring in so many ways, Swan. With words and with swords. But my personal favorite are the fights we fight with our bodies. You are an excellent sparring partner, love."

"You aren't that bad either." Emma admitted with a sly smile on her face.

"Oh, and just so you know." Killian said nonchalantly, almost as if the next words wouldn't be of any importance. "You're the first woman I've taken more than once since Milah."

"Should I feel flattered?" Emma asked, a strange feeling settling in the pit of her stomach.

"You should." Killian replied. "Because you are the first one in over three hundred years who was able to ignite the fire."

"The fire?" Emma said, almost too afraid to ask, regretting the question the moment she saw the intense gaze in his eyes.

"My body has only burned for one woman. Until I crossed path with you. Now every time we met the only thing occupying my mind is having my wicked ways with you. The fire might burn down to a simple glow when we don't see each other but the moment my eyes are falling on you it's like a gust blows into the ashes and just like that the fire roars back to life and the flames are licking at my body." He was standing so close to her now that their bodies were almost touching and he lifted his hand, his fingers threading into her hair, tilting her head backwards. Leaning forward his lips whispered over her skin until he reached her ear, his hoarse voice sending shivers down her spine as he continued. "I'm not finished with you yet, Swan. If I burn, you burn. I'm not gonna face the flaming hell alone … you are gonna face it with me."

Emma could only stare up at him as he leaned back to meet her eyes, his passionate words had rendered her speechless but her body was shouting, sizzling with desire. Yes, she was burning too. And then his lips were on hers, his tongue delved into her mouth, taking a last hungry kiss from her before he stepped back, leaving her completely out of breath.

"Until the next time, Sheriff." Killian said, his fingers skimming one last time over her cheek before he turned around and walked away.

"See you soon, Captain." Emma breathed, not sure if he could still hear her.

She had told her parents that it was over but as she was looking after him, walking down the road, she realized that it had been a lie. Nothing was over. She had absolutely nothing under control when it came to this man.

"You are screwed, girl." Emma whispered as she stared after his retreating form. Closing her eyes, she exhaled a shuddering breath, trying to find her way back to the reasonable woman, the woman who never ever let go of her control. But her blood was still humming in her ears, her body was still vibrating, already yearning for his touch again and her muscles ached, trembling slightly from the exertion of the last few minutes.

No, this wasn't over at all. She just wanted him too much. She wanted him to take her over and over again. It didn't matter what her head was telling her. It didn't matter that she knew this was a mistake. She couldn't withstand the temptation. She couldn't withstand him.

* * *

**Aehm, I told you it deserves the M-rating. :-)**

**The length of this chapter wasn't the only thing that got a little out of hand but believe me, these two are just always taking over the moment my fingers touch the keyboard. It's so not my fault. They are to blame. :-)**

**I'm exhausted now. So the only thing left for me to say is … please review! **

**And now I'm off to recharge my writing batteries and cool down a little. :-) **


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm always so eager to get to the chapter that I have completely forgotten to mention it so far. But I'm gonna do that now!**

**Thank you for the great welcome into this fandom and thanks for all the reviews, the favoriting and alerting. You are making this shipmate very, very happy. :-) **

**Do I really have to still warn you? I'm sure you know by now how my M-stories look like. But just to be safe. Here is your warning. :-) **

**This is not the dirtiest thing I've ever written ... I think. But it definitely comes close. Don't ask me why my dirty mind is so prominent lately. I have actually no clue why. Maybe because a certain pirate is just one handsome devil? Yeah, that might be a reason. Ha, ha. And no, I'm not only a 'Hooker' because of his looks. rolls eyes**

**Another ridiculous long chapter ahead. I think it's the longest chapter I've ever written, almost 7,000 words. Gahhh! What are they doing to my muse?**

**Well, anyways … I hope you enjoy! :-)**

* * *

**Chapter 4**

"Can you look after Henry? I need some air." Emma said with slight desperation in her voice, her leather jacket already in her hand.

"Emma?" Mary Margaret stepped closer, putting her hand tentatively on her daughter's arm.

"Not now, Mary Margaret. I can't talk." Emma shot her a pleading look before her eyes flickered to Henry who was lying on the bed, his face turned away from them. "Not now. Just … I need to get out of here."

"Sure." Mary Margaret said, letting go of Emma's arm.

She knew her daughter well enough by now. If she felt helpless when confronted with a certain situation she almost always went for a walk to clear her head. But she was certain that lately Emma used something completely different to untangle her thoughts. Mary Margaret would bet on it that her feet would take her to the harbor, seeking comfort she didn't know she was seeking in the arms of a pirate. She wasn't sure if that was the best way to deal with her problems but she would keep her mouth shut. No point in arguing about it.

Emma almost ran David over as she yanked the door open and rushed out of the apartment, her father just coming back from an errand. She didn't even look at him, only mumbled a quick greeting before she was flying out the door.

David looked after her with a puzzled expression on his face before he turned questioning eyes on his wife. Mary Margaret only shrugged her shoulders, glancing over to Henry and apparently he understood what she was trying to tell him as he gave her a short nod. But then a frown appeared on his forehead as he turned his head, staring down the hallway, his eyes darkening for a second before he released a deep sigh.

Stepping into the apartment, he closed the door firmly behind him, his hand tightening around the knob as he said quietly so that only his wife could hear him. "She is going to him, isn't she?"

"I think so." Mary Margaret said, watching her husband warily. Hook was always a tough subject. David's protective instincts always got the better of him when it came to Emma and her affection for a certain pirate.

"She can't stay away from him." David said, the words more a statement than a question.

"She doesn't want to stay away." Mary Margaret replied softly.

"I still don't understand why?"

"He gives her what she needs."

"Ahh, don't put pictures in my head." David groaned, pinching his nose with his fingers. "You are talking about our daughter."

"I didn't mean it in a dirty way." Mary Margaret told him, trying to explain what she meant when she saw the confused expression on her husband's face. "She is calmer after she'd been with him. I think around him she can let go. She always needs to stay at the top of her game as the sheriff of this town, then there is Henry and she still doesn't know how to act around us. She has to be alert all the time. But with him ..."

"She can be herself." David finished her sentence, not liking it one bit that a pirate was apparently able to help their daughter more than they could.

"Yeah, I guess she can." Mary Margaret said softly, slipping under his arm, pressing her body against his, knowing that he needed the physical contact to stay calm. "She doesn't want to impress him, she doesn't fear to make any mistakes with him. I know it sounds insane considering he is a pirate and definitely dangerous but I think with him she can just relax. She needs him, David. She needs him to release pressure and I might not like it that Hook is her 'go-to' guy for this but at least she has someone. Right now he is the glue that holds her together. Without him she would break into a million pieces. As much as we want to be the ones she seeks out for comfort … we can't give her what she needs. But he can."

"So we just have to live with it?"

"Looks like it."

"And what happens when he will hurt her?" David asked, the worry written all over his face.

"Then we'll be there for her and help her pick up the pieces."

"So it's already too late?"

"If you are asking if her heart is already in it, then yes ... " Mary Margaret said softly. " … it's already too late. She might not wanna see it, she might not wanna admit it but he is already in her heart. Maybe she doesn't love him ... yet. But he definitely means a lot to her. We just have to let her be."

"I know." David said quietly. He knew his wife was right but he still didn't feel comfortable with the fact that his daughter had some kind of romantic relationship with a pirate.

~K&E~

The fresh air helped a little bit, soothed her raging thoughts. He hated to fight with Henry. Their relationship was still so new that she hated it to put this disappointed look on his face. But she was his mother. She couldn't please him all the time. But it still hurt.

A memory suddenly flashed up in her brain. She suddenly recalled the day this damn pirate had showed her once again that you couldn't put him in one box. The revenge seeking villain was only one of his many facades. But he had so much more. Facades that were piercing through the wall she'd built around her heart, no matter how hard she tried to deny it.

~K&E~

"_Another one? You're gonna have stomach cramps when you eat another one of these sundaes." Emma said, hiding a smile as she looked down at Henry. "This is one big fat calorie bomb you're eating right now, kid. You will fall into a sugar coma if I'll buy you another one."_

"_No, I won't. Please, Emma!" Henry pleaded. "It just tastes so super awesome. Please, can I have another one?"_

_He was staring up at her with those puppy dog eyes of him and she laughed out loud, ruffling his hair. "Fine. You win."_

"_Awesome. Let's go." Henry said, walking backwards, stepping onto the street without even looking._

_Emma's head swirled around when she heard a screeching sound, her eyes fixating on the car that had just turned around the corner. The driver was apparently occupied with his sound system, even from this distance she could see that he wasn't paying attention to the street but playing around with the buttons of his radio. _

_Her assessment of the situation only took about two seconds but she still couldn't react. Her feet were frozen to the ground and her mouth opened in a silent scream, her hand reaching out. But she already knew that she wouldn't reach Henry in time. Everything felt as if it would happen in slow motion, she could see the car speeding towards Henry, could see his laughing face, could see his happy expression changing into shock as she followed her gaze and saw the car rushing towards him. _

_He would get hit by the car and there was nothing she could do. But then she suddenly caught a dark figure out of the corner of her eye and without really comprehending what happened in front of her she could just stare in wonder as a person clad in black leather jumped in front of the car, grabbing Henry and yanking him out of the way. Her mouth fell open and she watched them rolling over the ground until they stopped moving, Henry lying flat on the chest of his savior, the car speeding away, its driver apparently hadn't realized the tragedy he'd almost caused. _

_Neither her son nor the man who rescued him did move for a few seconds but then Henry shifted atop of the man lying on the ground and the man groaned loudly, cursing under his breath. _

"_Gods, that bloody hurts." His eyes popped open and he lifted his head, looking at the boy laying on his chest. "You okay, kid."_

"_I guess so." Henry replied slowly, sitting up, looking a little confused until his eyes focused on the man he was sitting on and a big smile appeared on his face before he exclaimed excitedly. "You're Captain Hook."_

"_Yeah, lad." Killian shot him a grin before he propped himself up on his elbows. "We've met before. Once."_

"_You are a pirate." Henry said breathlessly, obvious admiration playing over his face._

"_Indeed, I am."_

"_I bet you have tons of awesome stories to tell."_

"_Quite a few." _

"_Aehm ..." Emma cleared her throat as she stepped on the street. "Can we move this party to the sidewalk?"_

"_Of course, love." Killian replied, grinning up at her._

_The moment they all stepped off the street, Emma grabbed Henry and pulled him into a tight hug, burying her face in his hair as she whispered hoarsely. "Don't you ever scare me like that again, kid."_

"_I didn't want to scare you, Mom." Henry replied quietly._

"_I know." Emma said softly, grabbing his shoulders and pushing him back softly to look into his face. "Did you already thank the man who probably saved your life?"_

_Henry shook his head before he turned around to Killian. Killian looked down at the kid, completely taken by surprise as Henry rushed towards him, wrapping his arms around his waist and hugging him tightly._

"_Thank you, Captain Hook."_

"_You're welcome, lad." Killian replied, feeling slightly uncomfortable. _

"_Okay, after this scare you probably need another sugar boost. So, here you go." Emma put a ten dollar bill into his hand and Henry scurried off, the scare already forgotten. _

_Emma stared after him until he disappeared behind the door of the ice cream shop before she turned around to say her own thank you. She didn't like to owe him anything. But he had saved Henry's life. He jumped in front of a car for a kid he didn't even know._

"_Thank you." Emma said softly, meeting his eyes for the first time since they'd stepped off the street. "Thank you."_

"_You're welcome." Killian replied. _

_He'd said the same words only moments ago to her son but somehow they sounded different now. Or maybe it was just the fact that she was almost drowning in his eyes as he was staring at her without the cocky gleam in his eyes that was normally there. No, he knew exactly how serious the situation had been but for once he didn't take advantage of the fact that she was definitely in his debt now. But the more dangerous thread to her sanity was the fact that she started to like him. She really liked him. _

~K&E~

She'd seen them more than once sitting on a bench looking out on the ocean since Hook had saved Henry's life. Her son was always staring at the pirate with wide eyes, an expression of pure awe on his face as Hook was apparently telling him some of his probably ridiculously embroidered pirate stories.

Emma had to admit that he was good with kids and she didn't really know why. Of course she understood the fascination children immediately felt when they met him. He was a pirate after all. Children didn't need more to get overly excited. But there was something else. Watching him with her son just gave her another glimpse at the man he was before Rumpelstiltskin murdered the love of his life in front of his eyes.

He might have always been a pirate but she was certain that he had once been a good man despite his profession, at least a better man than a lot of other men she'd met in her life and she didn't want to admit it that her heart ached a little for the man that was probably lost forever.

Shaking her head, frustrated about her own sappiness, she lifted her gaze, groaning out loud as her eyes fell on the mast of a ship. Apparently she'd walked towards the harbor without really noticing it.

"As if you didn't know exactly where you would end up tonight." Emma said out loud, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Of course she would go to him. More than anything she needed an outlet for her frustration tonight and there was nothing better than a round of hot and steamy sex to release some tension and he was particularly good at making her forget everything around her for a few hours.

"I just have to get one thing first." She said quietly to herself, turning around to walk to the Sheriff's office. She had realized that she needed something more than 'normal' sex tonight, she needed to at least keep up the pretense that she had something under control. If only for one night. Her steps grew steadier as she walked briskly towards the office, a grin spreading out on her face as she imagined the next few hours. Yes, she would enjoy them immensely. No doubt about that.

_~K&E~_

His hand went immediately under his pillow, curling around the hilt of his knife and he turned his head, straining his ears. He didn't move a muscle, waiting for the intruder to come closer. Since he'd returned to Storybrooke he'd never taken his hook off when he went to sleep. Better be prepared. Rumpelstiltskin could search him out to get rid of him and he would not let the crocodile surprise him.

But then the person who'd entered his cabin took a step closer and his hand relaxed before his brain could fully register the smell that hit his nose. He should have expected it to be her. She almost always came. In the middle of the night. Her mouth hungry, her hands roaming greedily over his body before he was even fully awake.

But he stayed silent, wanting to wait how she would come to him this time, only tilting his head slightly to better hear her movements. He could feel her leaning over him and he anticipated a kiss but instead he heard the clang of metal against metal and cursed quietly as the cool metal clicked shut around his wrist a moment before she closed the other cuff around the post of his bunk. He was letting his guard down around her. He really needed to be more careful.

"Bloody hell. You've bested me again." Killian growled hoarsely, his voice still thick with sleep.

"Nice of you to keep your hook on." Emma whispered into his ear as she leaned forward, distracting him again. Her lips brushed over his cheek and he felt how her fingers tightened around his other arm. He didn't realize what she was doing until another cuff clicked shut.

"Nice and secure." Emma said proudly, shooting him a smug grin. "That will work."

"I knew you are into this."

"Yeah, it definitely has its perks." Emma replied, her eyes raking over his body making him feel as if he was lying naked in front of her and not covered by a sheet. "Did I already mention how much I appreciate it that you're sleeping naked?"

"No, you didn't." Killian replied. "So ... what are you gonna do now, love?"

"Having my bloody way with you."

"Sounds interesting."

She stared down at him for a few seconds before she lifted her hand to his face, one finger tracing over his lips, making them tingle and he lifted his head, his lips closing around it, his teeth scraping over her skin. But she pulled her finger out of his mouth just a second later, her voice taking on a reproachful tone. "Not so fast, pirate."

Leaning down to him, her tongue stroked tentatively over his bottom lip but when he opened his mouth to meet her tongue with his she bent back and he groaned lifting his head to follow her but she just pushed him back into the pillows. "Oh no, you're not gonna have control over this."

Shrugging out of her jacket, she threw it on the table before she lowered herself on the bunk, sitting down beside him. Her eyes took on a mischievous gleam as she trailed her fingers along his scruff, following the line of his jaw. His breathing quickened involuntarily as her finger skimmed over his throat, down his chest, taking the sheet with her.

She stopped her movement as she reached his hips and she shifted slightly, leaning down to press her mouth against the rapid beating pulse at the side of his neck. Killian closed his eyes, clenching his teeth as her mouth moved downwards, her tongue leaving a hot trail as she licked her way down his chest. Her fingers skimmed along the edge of the sheet never slipping under it and he bit his tongue, hardly able to call out a pleading, almost demanding from her to wrap her bloody fingers around him.

As if she could hear him she pulled at the sheet and Killian already wanted to sigh out a breath of relief since she was apparently following his unspoken wish. But she only uncovered one of his legs, trailing a path along the outside of his thigh and he bucked his hips upwards, wanting to get rid of the sheet but she pressed her hand against him, keeping him down. "No!"

His one hand tightened around the cuffs as her hand slipped closer to where he wanted her the most but her fingers only skimmed feather-like over him, never really touching him. He looked down his body and saw her fingers hovering over him and he held his breath awaiting her touch but it never came and he let his head fall back into the pillow, groaning out loudly.

"Something wrong?" Her soft, mocking voice was taunting him, making him want to strangle her.

"No." Killian gritted out through clenched teeth, trying desperately to keep his breathing even as he opened one eye to look at her. She was killing him and even in the dim light he could see her wide grin. She bloody well knew what she was doing to him. "You are gonna regret this."

"No, definitely not." Emma replied firmly, yanking the sheet away and he could hear a satisfied hum coming from her as her eyes fell on his obvious arousal. "Not one bit."

A rustling sound made him turn his head and he saw her kneeling in front of the bunk, the action almost making his heart stop as she leaned forward, her breath blowing softly over him and he shivered, not able to keep a moan from escaping. "Gods, Emma. Stop torturing me."

"You think this is torture?" She asked innocently, her tone making him dread her next move.

And then her fingers were back, trailing along his length, barely touching him and he held his breath, the desire to be in her almost driving him insane. Then suddenly her hand was around him, pumping him hard. Once, twice. Before her hand disappeared again, leaving him hard and throbbing.

"You're trying to kill me, aren't you?"

"No. You aren't of any use for me dead, are you?" Emma replied quietly.

But Killian couldn't even form an answer as she licked with her tongue over him and before his brain could even process this sensation, her mouth suddenly closed around him and he rocked his hips upwards, pushing deeper into her mouth and forgetting the cuffs around his arms, he leaned forward, cursing loudly as the metal rattled against the posts and he was jerked back violently. He could feel her mouth turning into a smirk as she let him slip out of her mouth, licking over his tip before she released him completely.

"You're panting." Emma said, pure triumph in her voice.

"Bloody fucking hell."

"Oh, you are apparently getting acquainted with the American coarse language."

"Damn it, Swan." Killian snapped, a deep growling sound rumbling out of his throat.

"Did you just growl at me?" Emma asked with mock indignation.

"Free me, Emma." Killian said hoarsely, leaning forward as far as the restraints allowed him. "I want to touch you."

She could have probably tortured him longer but she wanted him to touch her, she needed to feel his hands on her and she slipped her fingers into the pocket of her jeans and pulled the keys for the cuffs out.

She'd expected him to ruin another of her blouses as she opened the cuffs but he surprised her as he pushed her back gently so that he was able to stand up. Holding her breath, she waited for the inevitable assault of his mouth but he surprised her again, his mouth pressing softly against hers, his tongue slipping slowly into her mouth, tangling with hers in a sensual dance and his fingers trailed down her neck, unbuttoning her blouse slowly.

Her shirt fell open as he slipped the last button through the hole and she was amazed once again how skilled he was in mastering things one-handed without missing a beat where most people needed both hands for. Years of practice she assumed.

Slipping his hand around her waist, he clenched her shirt into his fist, pulling it down slowly, forcing her to lean back. The movement brought her breasts closer to him, her lower body was pressing into him and vibrations of hot desire sizzled over her skin as she felt him hard against her hip. The fact that he was completely naked aroused her more than she could have ever imagined and she arched her back, her eyes falling shut.

"Don't move." Hook said hoarsely and Emma's eyes fluttered open, her gaze following his hook as he slipped it carefully between the cup of her bra and her skin, his eyes searching hers as he draw his hook gently down, taking her bra with him. "You like this. You like me using my hook on you, don't you?"

She couldn't say a word, the ability to form any words had apparently left her the moment he'd started to undress her.

"Tell me, are you already wet for me?"

Emma took in a sharp breath as his tongue swirled around one nipple, a moan slipping over her lips as his mouth closed around it and sucked it in. He was always doing that to her. Making her forget where they were, making her forget who they were.

"Are you?"

"What was the question again?" Emma breathed, her breath coming out in shallow bursts as she tried to clear her brain from the hazy fog clouding it.

"Now who is panting?" Killian asked smugly and Emma could only stare into the deep blue of his eyes, not able to give him any kind of retort and his eyes softened, his smug grin turning into a soft smirk as he said. "Do you want me, love?"

"Yes." Emma replied, barely above a whisper. Her hands slipped up his arms along his neck, her fingers curling into his hair. "I want you."

Leaning forward, he released her shirt, capturing her lips to give her a searing kiss as his hand went to her jeans to open it and slipping his fingers under her panties, he groaned into her mouth. "Ahhh, you are always so wet for me."

Emma's hands fell from his neck and she clutched his upper arms desperately, needing to hold on to something as he pushed two fingers into her, pumping them slowly in and out.

"Oh my God." Emma whispered as his thumb brushed over her most sensitive spot and a first flutter spread out through her body, making her dizzy. But suddenly his hand was gone.

"Nooo!" Emma almost wailed. "Why did you stop?"

Killian grinned wickedly, lifting his hand to his mouth and licking his fingers clean, humming appreciatively as her taste filled his mouth.

"Is this some sort of revenge?" Emma hissed, narrowing her eyes dangerously.

"Maybe."

"So you are gonna torture me? Bringing me close to orgasm over and over again until I'll beg you?"

"Something like that." Killian replied, his mouth turning up into a smug grin.

"Not gonna happen, pal."

"You think too highly of me, princess." Killian said with a mocking voice. "I'm not that strong of a man."

"Stranger things happened." Emma replied.

"Take your clothes off, darling!" Killian coaxed.

"And what happens if I don't take them off?" Emma asked, slightly out of breath.

"Nothing." Killian shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. "I'll send you home."

"What?" Emma almost shouted, groaning inwardly as she saw a flash of amusement crossing his face. "You're messing with me."

"You are really easy." Killian chuckled.

"I should really leave you hanging like this." Emma snapped, waving her hand in the direction of his midsection.

"Fine." Killian rolled his eyes, sighing heavily. "Would you please step out of your clothes?"

"Well, since you've asked so nicely." Emma replied, taking off her clothes quickly.

"You are a hell of a sight for sore eyes, beautiful." Killian said, stretching out his hand. "Come here."

All the reluctance, all the fight went out of her as she met his eyes, seeing the passion burning hot and steady in the depths of his blue gaze and without hesitation she stepped into his embrace, welcoming the feeling of his naked skin against hers.

He lowered his face to her, his mouth hovering over her lips, his tongue slipping out to brush teasingly over her bottom lip and she opened her mouth on a moan, meeting his tongue in a passionate kiss.

He stepped forward, forcing her to walk backwards until her legs hit the table and he murmured against her lips. "One second, love."

Releasing her out of his arms, he leaned around her, swiping the table clean with one swift move, throwing everything on the ground.

"Lay back, princess. I'm gonna ravish you now."

She knew it was wrong to feel aroused by his hoarse spoken words. There was nothing good about being ravished. Except if you were being ravished by an insanely handsome pirate. Except if you wanted nothing more than to be ravished by the dark man standing in front of you whose burning eyes were setting your skin on fire.

"Then come and take me, pirate." Emma said defiantly.

Killian looked at her, bewitched by her determination to never back down one bit. Stepping closer, he pressed her down on the table, lifting her legs up to wrap them around his waist.

"Your wish is my command." Killian spoke hoarsely, pushing slowly into her, reveling in the feel of her walls surrounding him.

His thrusts were deliberately slow as if he still wanted to make her pay for her tying him down on the bed earlier. She always dreaded the times when he wasn't taken her hard and fast, the times where he took her almost gently, the times where it felt almost as if he was making love to her, the times he made her want to shout out his given name.

She didn't want to deal with the feelings his tenderness was evoking in her. She didn't want to have any feelings beyond desire when it came to him. Tightening her legs around him, she drew him closer, her hand reaching for his face, caressing his cheek. She wanted him to get rougher, she didn't need his gentleness. She didn't want it.

"Harder." She said hoarsely, letting out a satisfied groan as he immediately picked up the pace, hitting her deeper and harder, chasing every sentimental emotion away, just leaving her body vibrating, craving the release she knew he would give her and only moments later she could feel her body tense as his thrusts pushed her over the edge, giving her exactly what she wanted. Another mindblowing orgasm that shattered her into a million pieces.

~K&E~

He was sitting on the bunk, his back leaning against the wall and she was curled up on his lap, wondering how they'd gotten from the table to the bunk, wondering how he managed to tear her walls down every single time, wondering what the hell she was doing.

"You can still see it." Killian's voice broke through the silence, his fingers brushing over the fine white line where his hook had scraped her skin. "I think there will remain a scar."

"Just another battle wound." Emma whispered tiredly against his neck.

"Battle wound?"

"You were the one who said that everything we do to each other, with each other, is a battle."

"Yeah. Right." Killian replied before he added softly. "But I'm still sorry that I hurt you."

"I never thought you did it intentional." Emma said. Leaning back, she lifted her hand, grabbing his chin and turning his head towards her so that he needed to face her before she continued. "I knew you weren't aware of it. Hell, I didn't even notice it when it happened."

"Then why were you shouting at me?" Killian asked. "It sounded as if you were giving me the blame."

"I was mad."

"Yeah, I could see that."

"Mad at you for having such an affect on me." Emma told him, trying to explain her reaction. "Mad at myself for not being able to resist you."

"I get that." Killian replied. "I mean the 'not being able to resist me' part."

"Of course you do." Emma said, rolling her eyes before she leaned her head back against his shoulder, feeling much too comfortable in his arms for her own liking.

A few minutes of silence went by, his hand trailing up and down her spine, almost lulling her into sleep when his voice suddenly broke the silence again. "So tell me. What happened?"

"God, Hook. How do you do that?" Emma hissed, jerking back, almost toppling down from the bunk and she would have fallen to the ground if his arm hadn't pulled her back. "Am I really that transparent?"

"Yes, princess." Killian smirked upon seeing the annoyed expression on her face. "I can read you like a book."

"I had a fight with Henry." Emma admitted reluctantly. "Nothing major. Just one of those silly mother/son fights."

"So you came to me to blow off some steam?"

"Exactly."

"I'm always glad to be of service."

"Of course." Emma huffed out sarcastically. "Because you are so selfless."

"Uff, that hurts." Killian replied, putting his hand over his heart, making her roll her eyes at him again. "Stop being so silly, Hook."

He only chuckled, pulling her deeper into his body, stroking his hand up and down her arm while they were sitting in a strangely comfortable silence for another few minutes before she was the one who broke the silence this time.

"I wanted to ask you something for quite some time now." Emma said quietly and when she didn't continue Killian prodded carefully. "What question?"

"I haven't heard of any incidents in a while. No broken bones or cracked ribs. Where is the revenge seeking villain?"

"He didn't go anywhere." Emma saw the hard glint in his eyes and suppressed a shiver. "He is still here."

"Then what is he up to? When does he make his next move?"

"He is currently seeking another kind of satisfaction." Killian replied, elaborating further when he saw the puzzled expression on her face. "The sexual satisfaction."

"You are incorrigible."

"What?" Killian asked. "I'm still a man and after looking into this box with the moving pictures for quite some time now ..."

"Are you talking about a TV?"

"Yes, I guess that's what you're calling it. Anyways, apparently the brains of men aren't capable of doing two things at once so … for now the one thing my brain is focusing on is having sex with you. Besides, I don't get much sleep lately because a certain blond sheriff is using my body for her own pleasure."

"Please!" Emma huffed out exasperated. "I'm not using you. You make it sound as if I'm forcing myself on you."

"If I recall it correctly only two hours ago I was cuffed to the posts of my bunk while you were having your bloody way with me."

"And you enjoyed every single second of it."

"Well, ..." Killian began but Emma lifted her hand, putting her fingers over his lips and he smiled under her touch as she said sternly. "Don't even think about lying. You know I can spot a liar from ten feet away."

"Who said anything about lying?" Killian replied. "I wouldn't dare lie to you."

"Sure. Because you are such an honest man."

"Honesty is my middle name." Killian joked before his voice suddenly turned serious again. "But to get back to your question … Rumpelstiltskin doesn't go anywhere. I'm still keeping my eyes on him.

"You know that I can't let you kill him." Emma stated softly. "I'm the sheriff."

"We don't have to worry about that right now, love. You're keeping me well occupied."

"Fine. I will rest the case. For now."

"But Swan?" Killian spoke. "I still want to kill him. I told you that I won't stray from my path. For no one."

Emma leaned back, searching his face for over a minute before she sighed softly. "I hate you."

"I know, princess." Killian replied, giving her a soft smile.

"You don't even wanna know why?" Emma asked surprised.

"Oh, I'm sure there are many reasons. But enlighten me if you wish. What are the reasons?"

She sighed once again, shifting on his lap, her hand coming to rest on his chest before she finally spoke. "I hate you for making me want you so much that I don't really care about the villain but only the man. Maybe you're right."

"Right about what?"

"That I'm using you."

"I like to be used. Don't sweat over it." Killian said, flashing her a devilish smile, the kind of smile that never failed to make her stomach flip. "I'm ravishingly handsome. And then the whole pirate thing. Makes me irresistible. You might be a tough lass but you're still a woman."

"God, can you get any smugger?"

"I can certainly try." Killian shot back. "And you are actually proving my point?"

"And how did you come up with that delusional idea?"

"You are still here."

"Yeah, and don't ask me why. It doesn't make any sense to me either."

"It does make a whole lot sense to me, love." Killian said. "I told you, irresistible charm."

"I'm just gonna pretend you didn't say that." She huffed out, slightly frustrated and taking in a deep breath, she leaned back, trying to slip out of his arms but he tightened his grip around her and she looked up at him questioningly.

"Stay here tonight." He said simply.

"I should better get home."

"The trust issue again?" Killian asked, slightly annoyed that he still hadn't convinced her that he could be trusted.

"It's a lot to ask. To really sleep with someone." Emma tried to explain. "I mean sleep sleep."

"And you don't trust me."

"I'm not the cuddling type."

"And what are you calling this?"

"That's different." Emma said firmly. "It's the after sex cuddling. Completely acceptable. Cuddling is allowed until my muscles are able to function properly again."

"Oh, so I'm wearing you out?" Killian yelped surprised at her hand shot down between his legs and she wrapped her fingers tightly around him. "I swear, Hook, if you make another smug comment I will cut off your special _attachment_."

"Wouldn't do you any good." Killian said and he tilted his head, his tongue swiping over her earlobe and she cursed herself as her body betrayed her once again and she loosened her grip around him, enough for him to take advantage and with a swift move she didn't see coming she was on her back, feeling him pressing against her. "Like I said once before, there are more enjoyable activities I prefer to do with a woman on her back.

"God, just shut up and get on with it."

"So demanding." Killian grinned down at her and like always she felt the urge to slap the smirk from his face but before she could decide if she should probably really slap him he pushed into her and every coherent thought slipped out of her grasp as he started moving.

She didn't understand how it was possible that she wanted him so much. She'd just had him only an hour ago but she reveled in the feeling of having him in her again. She just couldn't get enough of him and it scared her, rattling her down to her bones. She was addicted to his touch, addicted to his body, to his voice. She was a slave to her own body which was constantly melting into a puddle on the floor the moment his hands touched her skin. She was doomed. But she still couldn't stop.

He was taking her away from reality, making her forget that she was a human being with an actual brain, reducing her to a person who was driven by her primal instincts.

"Come for me, love." His hoarse voice was all she needed to hear to come undone in his arms. "Come for me now."

And she did. Exploding into a million pieces, her body shattering, wave after wave crushing down over her, making her gasp for air as her body convulsed around him, as all her nerve endings sizzled with pure bliss as she felt him follow her only seconds later.

~K&E~

"What are you doing?" Emma asked groggily as he rolled down from her, taking her with him so that her head was lying on his chest, his arm wrapped securely around her. She felt as if she would never be able to move one muscle but that didn't mean that she would stay. "I told you I don't want to sleep here."

"Just be quiet for once, would you?" Killian growled. "Give us a few minutes to enjoy the afterglow. Not too much to ask, I suppose."

"Okay, two minutes." Emma said. "But not one second longer."

Ten minutes later she was still lying in his arms and she suddenly realized that she was exactly where she wanted to be. She didn't want to leave and she was just too tired to question her revelation.

"Hook?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't wanna go." Emma admitted quietly.

"Then don't go." Killian replied softly, reaching for the sheet and pulling it over both of them.

He shifted slightly to make it more comfortable for both of them and Emma inhaled a deep breath, suddenly overwhelmed by the intensity of his presence. He was just too much. But when his arm tightened around her she just relaxed into his body, listening to his heart beating steadily under her ear and when she drifted off to sleep, she wondered how something that was wrong on so many levels could feel so right.

* * *

**And now let me get back to fangirling over the CS spoilers. They totally made my day! Feels, I'm coming! :-)**

**Do you wanna give a fellow shipmate even more feels? Then please leave a review on your way out. :-)**


	5. Chapter 5

**I'm apparently not able to write chapters that have a 'normal' length for this story. I swear parts of this chapter just popped out while I was writing. Like their talk about a certain scar. This scene came totally out of the blue.**

**I actually split this chapter up because it got completely out of hand (I think it might have ended up to be over 10,000 words) and I told myself I could easily make two chapters out of it before I would pull an all-nighter to get the chapter finished and it would have been an all-nighter if I would have kept everything in this chapter and 'old' people like me need their beauty sleep. :-)**

**For everyone who expects some M-rated stuff in this chapter … sorry, but the smut was in the second part of the 'original' chapter, so you have to wait until the next chapter to get another raunchy scene. :-)**

* * *

**Chapter 5**

She slipped out of his arms in the wee hours of the morning, getting dressed as quietly as she could manage. She didn't want to wake him. She wasn't sure if she could face him right now. Stepping closer to the bunk, she looked down at him. He looked so peaceful in sleep. The hard edges of his face were smoothed, a completely relaxed expression adorning his face. Leaning down, she brushed her lips against his, suddenly feeling her heart constrict in her chest.

She had to admit the two sides of him were throwing her a little. On the one side he was an incredible fantastic lover, a man who she could talk to for hours without getting bored, a man she didn't feel uncomfortable with when they chose to say nothing. This side of him was making her weak, this side was making her heart pound loudly in her chest whenever his eyes fell on her, whenever one look of him told her how much he wanted her.

On the other side she had seen him when he was hell-bent on getting his revenge. When his features hardened, his eyes blazing hot with hardly suppressed anger, his voice turning into cold steel.

It was as if there were two people inside his body, fighting for dominance. On the one side Killian Jones, a man who probably already meant more to her than she was ready to admit and on the other side Captain Hook, a man who was driven by revenge, a man who didn't care about anything else than killing the man who murdered his love.

She hadn't wanted to develop feelings for him but it happened. She couldn't deny it any longer. She fought for so long against her feelings, against her heart. But standing in front of him now, staring down at his sleeping form, she realized that all the fight had been for nothing. She had clearly lost the battle.

The final blow that had crumbled all her defenses had probably been that one night at Granny's. How should she have stayed away from a man who was so freaking good-looking and who could sing? His voice had melted every resolve in her and she'd almost taken him right then and there at Granny's as his voice, his body brushing against hers, had made her so aroused that she'd almost snapped.

~K&E~

_She was beat. It had been a long day spent with boring but necessary and long overdue filing. Leaning her head on her hand, she stared aimlessly at the wall, her fingers closing around the tumbler with scotch. It was near closing hours and she was alone at Granny's what just suited her perfectly. _

_She didn't want any company. She just needed one or two scotchs before she could go home. A small voice in her head told her that not even two would give her a peaceful sleep but she just shoved the voice into a corner of her brain and ignored it. She was a strong-willed woman. She should be able to have her own brain under control, shouldn't she? Then why couldn't she stop dreaming about him?_

"_Hey beautiful, this seat taken?" He didn't even wait for her answer and slipped on the bar stool beside her._

_Great, she thought, just freaking great. Exactly what she needed to make this day even more draining. _

_Lifting her eyes tiredly up to his face, she gave him an exasperated look. "Not in a mood to talk, Hook."_

"_Who said anything about talking? We could just leave and ..."_

_Emma lifted her hand and stopped him in mid-sentence. "Not in the mood for your sexual innuendos either, Hook. I'm just trying to drink my scotch in peace. If you wouldn't mind."_

"_Ruby? Can I have the same please?" Killian gestured towards her glass and Emma just shrugged one shoulder resignedly. She was too tired to get in any argument with him. If he wanted to stay she would just finish her scotch and go home. _

_She could always take a night cap at home. Mary Margaret's bar was always well stocked. Maybe she should just crawl into bed with a bottle of wine and read a good book. She hadn't done that in a while. Maybe one of this sappy romance novels could take her thoughts of a certain pirate who was currently sitting right beside her. Watching him out of the corner of her eye, she studied his profile, her tired brain not able to keep herself from wondering how his scruff might feel against her skin when he would press his lips on hers, if his eyes would change color when he got aroused. _

_Snatching up the glass, she downed the rest of the content in one gulp. She already wanted to hop from the stool when he stopped her as he announced. "__I know this song."_

_Emma furrowed her brows, listening to the song currently playing in the background. Her eyes widened in surprise as she recognized the infamous Joe Cocker song. Definitely not a song she needed to hear in her current state of mind. It only conjured up unwanted pictures in her head. Unwanted pictures about a naked pirate being at her mercy. _

"_It was on this movie Dr. Whale made me watch the last time. About this hot love affair. It was kind of interesting." _

"_When did you and Dr. Whale got so cozy that you are watching movies together?" Emma asked surprised until a more disturbing thought crossed her mind. "__You watched 9 and a half weeks?"_

"_Yes, that was the title."_

"_What's next?" Emma asked disgruntled. "Porn?"_

"_Porn?" Killian asked surprised and Emma blushed as she realized that she could certainly not explain to him what porn was. But he'd apparently figured it out for himself as a big smile erupted on his face. "Ah, judging by the blush on your cheeks it's something a lot more revealing than 9 and a half weeks, right?" _

"_So not a topic I want to discuss with you."_

"_You were the one who brought it up, love. I should certainly check this porn out. Wanna join me?"_

"_I'm tired, Hook. Could you just, for once, stop being such a pain in the ass."_

_She closed her eyes for a second before she pushed herself up from the stool. But she only took one step as she heard him begin to hum a moment before he started to sing along with the song. The shock about hearing him sing froze her to the spot._

"_You can leave your hat on. You can leave your hat on." _

_His voice was completely taking her by surprise, knocking the breath out of her. His accent making the words even more suggestive as his voice almost reached Joe Cocker's husky timbre._

_She didn't even realize that she'd closed her eyes as she suddenly felt him behind her, his fingers brushing her hair back as he leaned forward, his lips teasing her ear, his voice whispering tauntingly. "Go over there, turn off the lights."_

"_Oh my God, you can sing?" Emma sighed, the words almost coming out on a whimper as she continued. "That's not fair, Hook."_

"_Why?" Killian asked, his fingers trailing down her neck, barely touching her skin. "Does my voice arouse you?"_

"_Of course not." Emma huffed, concentrating on keeping her body from reacting to his nearness. Ruby had apparently vanished into thin air because she couldn't hear or see her anymore and cursing inwardly she tried to step away from him but shockingly she couldn't, her body refused to cooperate as she stayed right where she was, pressed against his body._

"_They don't know what love is, they don't know what love is." His voice made her whole body tingle, the urge to turn around to him was almost unbearable. "But I know what love is."_

_Suddenly he spun her around, pulling her into his body, his arms encircling her waist and her breath hitched in her throat as he started to dance. He could not only sing, he could also dance and Emma wondered how someone like he could even exist. He didn't only have a handsome face but also could dance and sing. He could only be a work of the devil because clearly God couldn't be so cruel to send such a creature down on earth to play havoc with every woman on the planet. _

_But for just a few moments she let herself forget who he was and just enjoyed being in his arms, swaying to the music, his voice singing softly into her ear. Her head dropped on his shoulder and she allowed herself to linger there, taking in his unique scent. For just a few seconds she let herself think about everything that could be if they would have met under different circumstances, if they would be different people. If they wouldn't be standing on different sides. If they would just be Emma Swan and Killian Jones, without the packages they were carrying, without all the scars that covered their bodies and souls._

_As the song ended, she stayed in his arms for a few more precious seconds before she pulled out of his embrace, throwing him a dazzling smile, hoping that he wouldn't see through the mask she'd put on to hide the turmoil he'd caused in her. _

"_Nice moves, Captain." Emma said, hoping that her voice wouldn't betray her. "I bet they got you into more than one bed. Understandable. But I'm not one of those shallow women who swoon only because of a pretty face and a hot body. You should just give up already, Hook. You and me? We will never happen."_

_She already thought that for once she'd kept the upper hand but as she reached the door his voice cut through the air. __"__We are gonna finish this, Swan. Some day we are gonna finish this."_

~K&E~

She should have known that telling him that they would never happen would only lead to him trying harder and now they were here. Together. On his ship. After another night of passionate love.

Her hands itched, her fingers wanted to reach out to him again, wanted to outline his face, his body, as if she needed to memorize everything about him, as if only watching him wasn't enough.

She wondered if she would ever be able to turn her back on him. Because eventually she had to. Eventually this had to end. They had no future. The sooner she acknowledged that the less painful it would be to go separate ways. But she just needed a little more time with him. She wasn't ready to leave him. Not yet.

~K&E~

She was staring into space, her thoughts once again occupied with reveling in memories. But now was not the time to think about how amazing they were in bed together or wherever the lust overcame them. She was still amazed that they hadn't been caught in the middle of the act yet because they never seemed to care about their surroundings and this uncontrollable lust scared her a little bit.

Shaking her head, she reminded herself that she had a serious matter on her hand and all she could think about was him. She really needed to examine her feelings. She needed to ask herself where this whole thing with Hook should lead. It was probably time to end it before it would spiral completely out of control. And she would. When this was over.

But right now she needed to focus on the fact that it seemed that a vampire was on the loose in Storybrooke. The bite marks he or she left on the victims were clearly made by a vampire. Someone was drawing blood from people.

Her parents were knocked out by the flu but she didn't have the time to wait any longer and the man she was sleeping with was actually an excellent swordsman, not to mention that he was right. They made quite a team. She would ask him for help.

~K&E~

"I feel honored that you asked me for help, love."

"We make a good team."

"So tell me again. What are we looking for?" Killian asked and Emma listed once again all the evidence she'd gathered over the last few days.

Killian listened intently until she'd finished before he leaned his chin on his hook and raised one eyebrow, the pose making her smile. "You did take into account that we might deal with the ultimate vampire? Considering that we are in Storybrooke and apparently this town attracts the most evil creatures."

"What are you talking about?" Emma asked confused. "What do you mean with ultimate vampire?"

"Count Dracula, of course." Killian replied, holding his hand and hook up in the air like he wanted to say 'Duh, isn't it obvious'.

"Don't tell me he really exists." Emma groaned, a chill running down her spine. "I have enough of all those villains who pop up in the real world. They are supposed to be only myths. They should only exist as written words in a book. Why can't they stay in their fantasy world?"

"So I am a myth, too?" Killian raised one eyebrow in question, the corner of his mouth twitching slightly as he waited for her answer.

"Yes, you shouldn't exist in real life either." Emma stated, rolling her eyes in mock exasperation.

"You seem to enjoy the real life version of me very much, though."

"Yeah, I do." Emma admitted, her voice taking on a soft note. "You're the exception of the rule."

"I very much like to be an exception."

"I know you do."

"Then let's get this villain so that my swan can sleep at night without having to worry that Count Dracula is coming to her room to make her his slave."

"I'm not your swan." Emma told him sternly. "And please, I'll never be anyone's slave."

"Of course." Killian replied. "You are way too strong minded for that. No one will ever catch you on the wrong foot. Emma Swan is too tough to make a mistake more than once."

"What do you mean?"

"You never will be at risk to become Dracula's slave because you will never ever let a man get close to you again." Killian explained. "You've closed yourself off, love. I can see it. The scar he left on your heart."

"What scar?" Emma asked, already knowing the answer to her question, though.

"The scar that stayed when he broke your heart." Killian spoke softly. "The scar the only man you've ever been in love with left when he abandoned you. When he sent you to prison for a crime he'd committed. You've lost faith in people. You've lost faith in love."

"I never should have told you about Neal."

"I'm not gonna use it against you, Emma."

"You just did."

"I didn't mean to." Killian said apologetically. "I'm sorry, love. I know it's hard to gain your trust. But you can trust me, Emma. I'm not gonna betray you. Not like he did."

Emma studied his face for a very long time but she could only detect pure honesty on his features and she opened her mouth to tell him that she trusted him as she suddenly noticed a movement in the shadows of the trees over his shoulder.

"I think he is here." She whispered and he stiffened immediately, ready to fight.

"Then let's get this over with, shall we?"

They turned around, looking back at the trees they'd emerged from just a few minutes ago. They were standing at the edge of a precipice, the only place Dracula could be hiding was the forest in front of them. They didn't even have the time to draw their swords as they both turned their heads as they heard rustling coming from their right side.

"I assume, you were searching for me." A dark figure stepped out of the shadows and Emma stared at him completely amazed for a second.

He looked exactly as she imagined him to look like. This whole 'characters of books showing up in real life' was getting creepier from day to day. He was eerily pale, the black overcoat he was wearing only emphasizing it, the red lining reminding her of the blood he needed to stay alive. Though staying alive wasn't really describing it properly because he was a vampire and therefore he was already dead but he couldn't function without human blood that she was sure of. Because at least the books got some points right and considering that he had been draining people of their blood, this fact seemed actually true.

"Count Dracula, it's a pleasure to meet you." Killian's voice cut through the silence and she had to keep herself from looking at him completely baffled.

"And you're Captain Hook, I assume." Dracula replied with a mocking voice. "I've heard of you."

"My reputation precedes me. I'm not surprised."

"So you searched for me with the intent to kill me? A lot tried before and as you can see no one succeeded so far."

"I don't want to kill you." Emma threw in. "I just want to get you off the streets. I'm not even sure if you can be killed. Maybe only with a special weapon that I certainly don't have. So I'm just gonna be satisfied with knocking you out and putting you in jail."

"Feisty woman you have there, Hook." Dracula said, letting out a chuckle.

"Don't underestimate her." Killian said sharply. "I did and she could have killed me if she would have wanted to."

"Apparently she didn't want you dead."

"No, she doesn't kill people for no reason. That's just not her."

"Good to know." Dracula stated. "Then let's see how good you two are."

Emma was hardly able to pull her sword out of its sheath, the one Mulan gave her mother, to deflect the first ball of magic he threw towards them and without needing to say anything Killian realized that he couldn't fight directly against him since he had no weapon against magic on his hands.

Showing her how great of a team they really were, he reached for the wooden stick she had tugged into her pants earlier and Emma understood immediately what he was intending to do. He wanted to sneak up to Dracula and surprise him from behind, driving the wooden stick into his heart what should at least slow him down, maybe if they were lucky even incapacitate him.

Emma nodded her head almost imperceptibly to tell him that she knew what he wanted to do. Dracula had walked in a circle around them and now he was standing in front of the precipice so Hook whispered almost completely inaudible. "I'm going to run into the woods. Let's hope he thinks I'm fleeing."

Emma couldn't even give him a nod this time because Dracula's magic was hitting her harder than before. They'd apparently taught him well in the school that was mentioned in the books. Scholomance. A school of black magic.

"Your companion seems to have abandon the sinking ship." Dracula said, his statement accompanied by a deep laughter. "But don't worry. You won't have much time left to be hurt about his betrayal. Because I will end you very soon."

Emma was deflecting one ball of magic after the other, trying to distract him so that Hook had the opportunity to get behind his back and she kept her eyes trained on Dracula's face when she saw Hook stepping out of the woods behind Dracula.

But their plan backfired as Dracula just stretched his other hand out and shot a streak of magic towards Hook and he froze in place as if he'd run into a wall. Emma could see him leaning forward as if he was fighting to stay upright against a storm but his feet slipped over the ground as the streak shooting out of Dracula's hand pushed him backwards and Emma had to watch helplessly as Hook was pushed closer and closer to the precipice apparently not able to step out of the trajectory of the streak of magic.

"No! Hook!" Emma shouted, her arms starting to shake as another ball of magic hit the blade of her sword and forcing her down on her knees.

A big, evil smile was adorning Dracula's face and Emma's eyes flickered back to Hook who was still fighting to stay away from the precipice. But no matter how hard he tried he couldn't keep himself away and his eyes locked with hers for a second before another push made him lose his footing and he slipped down. Emma could see him dig his hook into the ground to keep himself from falling and Dracula apparently hadn't realized that he hadn't pushed Hook completely over the edge as he concentrated all his force back on Emma.

"Killian!" Emma cried, hot fury sizzling through her body and she looked back at Dracula and the streak of his magic wavered a little bit as he furrowed his brows, apparently starting to have a slight sliver of doubt about who might win this fight as he saw the determined expression on her face and Emma shouted. "You've just made a mistake."

She could feel how the magic inside of her concentrated itself into a tight ball and she curled her fingers, waiting for the magic to wander down her arm and right into her palm. A hot, pulsating fire ball appeared in her hand and she looked up at Dracula triumphantly.

"Take this." Emma yelled and threw the ball towards Dracula. He apparently didn't expect her to use magic and she took him by surprise, her magic hitting him square in the chest and he crumbled down, his body hitting the ground hard.

She only waited a few seconds to make sure that Dracula was out for good before she rushed towards the precipice, scrambling down on her knees and crawling towards the edge. His hook was gone and her heart was beating wildly in her chest, cold sweat breaking out on her skin as the fear what she would see when she looked over the edge slammed into her and she already prepared herself to see his crushed body on the ground.

"Killian! Please no!" She whispered as she slowly pushed herself over the edge, the relief upon seeing him hanging a few feet below almost made her black out. "You've scared the crap out of me."

Looking around, she grabbed a root with her left hand and leaned down, stretching her right hand towards him. "Take my hand, Killian."

He swung his hand up and gripped her arm just in time before his hook lost its hold in the earth. Dangling for a second on her arm, Emma thought her shoulder would pop out and she gritted her teeth to suppress the groan that wanted to escape her throat.

Killian tried to dig his hook into the earth again but it was either too friable or stone-hard, he couldn't manage to get a hold and his feet were barely able to find ground to stand on. He looked up at her, a sad smile appearing on his face as he said softly. "Let go, Swan!"

"No, I'm not gonna let go." Emma told him, shaking her head.

"Emma." The tentative tone of his voice made tears well up in her eyes, one escaping her eyes and trailing down her cheek.

"I'm not gonna let go off your arm, Killian. End of discussion." Emma replied, not even caring anymore that another tear slipped out of her eye. "No. Damn it. I'm not gonna let you fall to your death. I'm just not …. nooooo!"

Her fingers slipped along the leather of his coat and his eyes were telling her that he knew she couldn't hold him any longer. "Killian, no!"

"It's okay, Emma. It's not your fault." His hand opened around her arm, telling her silently that he was ready for her to let go. "Let go, love. It's okay."

"It's so not okay, you bloody Irish bastard. I'm not okay with letting you die."

Suddenly her arm began to glow, pulsing waves of a golden light rushed down her arm and when the light reached her hand it jumped over to Killian's arm, making his arm glow as well and without questioning it she pulled at Killian's arm again and this time she'd managed to draw him up inch by inch until he could dig his hook into the earth at the top of the precipice again and was able to pull himself up the rest of the way.

Emma slumped back, Killian kneeling in front of her, both panting as they tried to process what just happened.

"How did you do that?" Killian asked, still a little breathless as he looked up at her.

"Magic." Emma replied simply as if it was completely normal and not surprising at all that she'd just used magic to save his life.

"You said my name." Killian stated softly, a small smile tilting up his mouth.

"It was just a slip of my tongue." Emma shot back, the experience of him almost dying still to fresh in her mind to show him any vulnerability. She would have never called him by his given name under normal circumstances. Calling him by his moniker was the only thing that helped her to keep her emotional distance because she couldn't let him get too close.

"And the tears?" Killian asked, brushing his thumb over her wet cheek. "Are those for me?"

"No. My shoulder hurts like hell." Emma huffed. "These are tears of pain."

"Of course, love." Killian replied quietly. "You wouldn't shed tears for me, would you?"

Suddenly their bodies snapped to attention when they heard something approaching through the woods. It actually sounded as if a stampede was on its way towards them but they couldn't move. All they could manage was sitting on the ground and staring at the tree line.

A sigh of relief burst out of her as she saw what had made this enormous noise. Half the town was charging towards them, questions flying through the air, Ruby dropping on her knees beside her, searching her body for any injuries.

Apparently her parents had sent them after her and a warm feeling slipped into her stomach. She'd spent years of her life alone, no one giving a damn about her well-being. But within a year she'd met her parents, her son and earned so many friends in a town she didn't want to stay at first.

In the whirlwind of actions that swept over them they weren't able to say anything else to each other. Emma was busy with calming Ruby down who scolded her for going after Dracula on her own and Emma was smart enough not to mention that she didn't go after him alone but that Hook was at her side the whole time. She knew Ruby wasn't very fond of the pirate and she suspected that her friend knew that he was more to her than a fleeting acquaintance but Emma appreciated it that Ruby tried not to judge.

Killian was surrounded by the dwarfs who were trying to get the whole story from him. They might not like him but they respected him for helping Emma because they were dedicated to her parents, they would give their life for Snow White and Prince Charming and since the moment they'd learned that Emma was their daughter they were dedicated to her as well. She still felt a little uncomfortable knowing that a lot of people would give their life to save her. She'd fought her battles alone for so long that it still made her a little queasy to see someone standing up for her.

But it was actually way easier to accept that her parents and her friends were willing to risk their life for her than to accept that Captain Hook was risking his life over and over again for her. She didn't like the conclusions she was inadvertently drawing from this. He cared about her and she actually wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe that he would never betray her like Neal did.

Emma looked up, searching for him in the crowd, her lips parting slightly as she met his gaze. The way he was looking at her made her stomach flip. Saving his life had just tightened the bond they shared. They both knew it. Something had shifted. Something had changed. But they were both not ready to put it into words. They were both not ready to face the fact that they might be able to heal each other's scars.

* * *

**Okay, I have already ants in my pants because I can't wait to see tomorrow's episode. But no matter if we'll get any Captain Swan scenes at least Hook is back! **

**Big thank you to all my reviewers! You're awesome. And almost 90 followers? That makes me kind of speechless. So much people want to know what will happen with Killian and Emma in this little ficlet? **

**That makes me extremely happy and anxious at the same time because I don't want to disappoint anyone and some of you might not like where I'm gonna take this story but first the next chapter will be full of awesome Killian/Emma feels. Consider it a 'calm before the storm' chapter. A last treat before we are getting to the angst part of this fic. :-)**

**Please review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**I needed to distract myself because the anticipation is killing me. So here you go! **

**Don't forget the rating! Because you'll get Killian in a bathtub and you know where this leads, don't you? ;-)**

* * *

**Chapter 6**

The wind was driving under her jacket, blowing it up and Emma wrapped her arms around her waist, shuddering slightly. The bottle she'd taken with her was digging into her stomach as she was standing on the pier, staring up to the silhouette of the ship right in front of her. She had to come. She just couldn't stay away.

She had been well aware of the knowing look Mary Margaret had shot her way when she'd grabbed the bottle of whiskey from the shelf. She had seen David furrow his brows, a worried expression flashing over his face.

As much as she had missed her parents over the years, in situations like this, she wished she would have a place of her own. At least they hadn't asked her any questions. What would have been the point anyway? They both knew where she was going.

She just needed to check up on him. She needed to make sure that he was okay. Though she knew it wasn't necessary to see how he was doing. They'd both been sent to the hospital and got checked out. Her shoulder was a little strained and they both had bruises covering their whole bodies. But there was nothing broken. Their bodies were merely battered.

But Emma was exhausted, the day taking a toll on her and she just didn't have it in her to fight the urge to go see him. She just needed to see him. She needed to hear his voice. She needed to see his face. She wanted to feel her body warming up with the heated gazes he'd always seemed to shoot her way.

The fear of losing him was still settled deep into her body because it had been an extremely close call. If she wouldn't have been that desperate her magic would probably have stayed away. But she couldn't lose him. She just couldn't.

And now she was here. Standing in front of his ship. Her fingers tightened around the bottle and she took in a shuddering breath. She was pathetic. She really was.

Her brain was telling her to turn around and go home. It wasn't a good idea to be with him when she felt that vulnerable. He could always see right through every facade she put on to mask her true feelings; he always had.

But her feet were carrying her already up to his ship and a small smile appeared on her face. She should probably run in the other direction but she'd never felt more at peace with herself than right in this moment as she stepped down the stairs and walked towards his cabin, lifting her hand to knock softly.

~K&E~

Killian closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wood, his fingers dipping into the water as his body relaxed, the warmth surrounding him loosening his muscles and bending his knees he slipped deeper into the water.

It had been close. It had been really close. But it wasn't the first time that death had breathed down his neck. He was three hundred years old and he'd lost count a long time ago. But this time had been different. This time someone had cared about him. This time someone actually had cared if he would live or die.

Without Emma he would be dead. He damn well knew that. Without her magic he wouldn't be here anymore.

A knock at the door made him open his eyes slowly. Who the hell could that be? He wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. But then he realized that it was the middle of the night and there could be only one person standing on the other side of the door who would bother to knock.

"Come on in, love."

Emma stepped into the room, her eyes widened slightly in surprise as she saw that he was taking a bath.

"Seriously? A wooden bathtub?" Emma said, rising an eyebrow in mock question. "You know, you can rent a room at Granny's and bathe in a real bathtub."

"I'm used to it. Besides I thought I would be undisturbed on my ship. Guess I was wrong." Killian replied softly, leaning his head back again and shooting her a look under half-closed eyelids, he asked quietly. "What are you even doing here? Wasn't the day eventful enough for you?"

"I just wanted to make sure you're okay." Emma answered, groaning inwardly. He would make fun of her. Of course he would. But he didn't and she raised an eyebrow in surprise as his mouth curled up into a soft smile as he stated softly. "I'm fine, love."

His hand went over the edge and he picked up the glass that had been sitting on the floor, the clear liquid sloshing against the walls before he took a huge gulp, a contended sigh slipping over his lips as the alcohol burned down his throat.

For a second Emma couldn't say or do anything, the picture in front of her taking her breath away. The deep purple bruises on his body combined with the exhausted expression on his face, making her feel as if someone had just sucker-punched her.

"Put this awful rum away." Emma barked, harsher than she'd intended to and his eyes snapped open in surprise. "I have something much better for you."

She held up the bottle in her hand and he squinted his eyes, trying to decipher the writing on the bottle, a smile tilting up the corner of his mouth as he read the label. "Irish whiskey? I might say that's quite an improvement."

Emma stepped towards the tub and took the glass out of his hand, throwing the rest of the rum into a nearby basin before she poured a generous amount of the amber liquid into the glass. Looking around, she found another glass and poured herself some whiskey too before she slipped the glass back into his hand and walked towards the bunk, leaning against the post, watching him taking his first gulp.

"You were right, love." Killian groaned softly, nodding his head appreciatively. "Much better."

She couldn't keep her eyes away from him, the droplets that were shimmering on his skin in the dim light the lantern was casting through the cabin, making her fingers itch. The urge to touch him, to trail her hands over his body was almost unbearable.

"Either you stop staring and go away or you join me, love." Killian said groggily, his head falling back against the wood and Emma gulped hard as her gaze roamed over his body.

He didn't even open his eyes as he growled. "I told you to stop staring, Swan."

"I never get tired of watching you." Emma whispered, the events of the day catching up on her and making her all sentimental. But seeing him alive and well, leaning naked against the edge of the bathtub with closed eyes clogged her throat with emotions and as he opened his eyes, she stepped closer, her fingers already working on her clothes and she spoke softly. "You are a beautiful man, Killian Jones."

He just looked at her for a few seconds before he lifted his hand slowly, droplets of water dripping down on the floor as he stretched his hand out. "Come, love. Get in here."

Dropping the last piece of her clothing on the floor, Emma stepped into the bathtub, lowering herself between his legs, groaning loudly as the warm water hit her tensed muscles and leaning back she let her head drop on his shoulder, relaxing against his body.

As she opened her eyes slowly her gaze fell on his left arm and she didn't know why she hadn't realized it sooner that he wasn't wearing his hook. The rest of his body had been apparently too distracting. Trailing her fingers over his arm, she paused a few inches before his arm ended in the stump and asked softly. "Do you still feel it?"

"Feel what?"

"Your hand."

"It isn't there anymore, love."

"We call it phantom pain. People who have lost limps are often saying that they could still feel them from time to time as if they would still be there."

"Phantom pain?" Killian spoke quietly, his lips brushing over her forehead as he turned his head slightly. "Yeah, I can feel it. From time to time. Some days I wake up and I could swear that I'd just moved my fingers."

"I'm sorry." Emma said, skimming her fingers tentatively over the scar tissue of his stump.

"It's gone for a very long time, love. It's just another thing I got used to. Didn't have much of a choice anyway, did I?"

She turned around slightly, wanting to see his face and the movement brought her hip in contact with something hard and long and Emma scoffed. "Seriously? You are half dead with tiredness."

"My cock never sleeps." Killian replied quietly and Emma slapped her hand against his arm. "What? Don't tell me I offended you by using the word cock. How long do we two know each other now?"

"Way too long." Emma groaned.

"It doesn't help the matter that you're pressing your breasts against my chest and you should probably also keep your hands to yourself if you don't want me to react."

"Should I?" Her hand trailed down his chest, disappearing beneath the water, her fingers playing over his stomach.

"Not on my behalf." Killian stated, a slight groan escaping him as her fingers made contact with his arousal for a second. "I very much appreciate what you're doing, love."

"I can feel that." Continuing to caress his skin, she'd never increased the pressure, her fingers only touching him softly as she let her fingers skim up and down his thigh, her palm ever so often brushing softly against him.

"Emma?" Emma looked up, not stopping the movement of her hand as he watched her intently, his eyes dark with desire. "If you don't stop this now I'm going to need to take you."

"I don't want to stop."

"Okay." Killian replied and suddenly he pushed himself up one-handed, standing up in the bathtub and Emma stopped breathing for a second as her eyes followed his movement.

Droplets of water were running down his body, his obvious arousal letting her mouth go dry while pure desire shot straight down to her core. He was indeed a beautiful man. A man whose body was telling the story of a warrior. His skin was covered with scars, his muscles toned from years of sword fighting and commandeering a ship.

"Oh my!" Emma sighed and taking his hand she stood also up, her legs shaking slightly as she pressed a hand against his chest, feeling the hair curl beneath her fingers, his length pressing against her stomach as he leaned down and captured her lips for a searing kiss that left her breathless.

"Do you trust me?" Killian asked softly, his hand threading into her hair, his thumb caressing her cheek as he leaned down once again, brushing his lips over hers.

Staring up into his eyes, the ghost of his voice from all these months ago whispered in her head.

_Try something new, love. It's called trust. _

"Yes, I do." She replied, her words barely above a whisper.

"Then kneel down." Killian told her, stopping her with his hand as she wanted to drop on her knees in front of him. "No, not like this. I would love your mouth on me but not today. Today I can't wait to be in you. As deep as possible."

Emma needed a second before she realized what he wanted and a current of electricity shot through her body as she turned around and lowered herself on her knees right in front of him. She could hear him kneel down behind her and his soft voice reached her ears as his fingers brushed her hair away from her shoulder, goosebumps running over her body as he trailed his hand along her spine.

"Is it too uncomfortable, love? We can always go to the bunk."

"No, it's ... ohhh." Emma sighed as one of his fingers slipped into her and her hands tightened around the wood as he pumped it slowly in and out of her.

"Is it?"

"No ..." Emma whispered, her whole body starting to ache as he added a second finger. "Not uncomfortable at all."

"I want you so much, Emma." Killian bend forward, his breath brushing hot over her cheek as he rasped. "It's never enough, love. The moment I slip out of you I already yearn to be back inside, engulfed by your warmth."

His fingers disappeared and leaning forward, he pressed his arousal against her, his hoarse voice reaching her ear. "Do you feel it? Do you feel it how much I want you?"

"Yes." Emma breathed, pushing backwards. "I can feel it."

"Say my name, Emma." Killian spoke huskily, shifting behind her, aligning his body against hers, ready to enter her. "Please, Emma. Say my name."

"Killian." Emma sighed, her breath hitching in her throat as he pushed into her, a small whimper escaping her as he started to move. Almost losing him had apparently affected her more than she was willing to admit, the emotions rolling over her body as he trust into her, making her heart clench in her chest and tears burning at the back of her eyes.

"I savor every second I'm in you, trying to memorize every sensation so that I can remember it whenever I need to. You have bewitched me, Emma. The need to be in you ... it's like the air I need to breathe. Without it I would suffocate."

She wanted to say something as beautiful, wanted to assure him that she felt the same way but the words got stuck in her throat as his hand trailed down her stomach and his finger rubbed over her most sensitive spot.

Pushing herself up from the edge, she lifted her arms, wrapping them around his neck, her back arching with the movement and his arms closed around her, keeping her steady, his mouth crashing down on hers as he pushed into her over and over again, taking her to a place where the only thing that mattered was being in his arms and letting go off the reality for a few precious moments.

~K&E~

She was lying in his arms afterwards, too groggy to move, her eyes fixated on a puddle of water on the floor. The whole ground around the bathtub was wet, they hadn't even noticed the water that had sloshed over the edge as he took her with powerful thrusts. They were too consumed by each other to realize that they were making a mess of his cabin.

But she didn't find it in her to care and apparently neither did he. He had just stepped out of the tub and had pulled her towards the bunk, not even bothering with drying their bodies as he had lowered himself on the bunk with her. He had made love to her once again, caressing her whole body with his hand and mouth, turning her world upside down over and over again before he'd finally answered her pleas and filled her again, pushing her over the edge, groaning her name as he'd followed her.

Turning around slowly, she searched his gaze, her fingers coming up to his face, ghosting over his lips as she said softly. "Killian?"

"Yes, love." He replied, his lips moving under her fingers and she trailed them over his jaw, her thumb brushing over his scruff as she spoke barely above a whisper. "I think you should know that I really like you. Only God knows why, though. But I really like you and I'm glad you didn't die today."

"I like you too, my swan." Killian told her, a soft smile grazing his lips and titling his head to press a kiss against her palm, he asked. "Are you staying for the night?"

"Yes, I'm staying." Emma stated and laying her head back on his shoulder, she wrapped her arm around his waist before she drifted off to sleep.

One hour later he was still awake, staring at the ceiling, listening to her even breaths beside him. Slipping slowly out of the bed, careful to not wake her up, he walked silently towards the table, filling the glass that was sitting on the surface with more than two fingers of the whiskey she'd brought with her. The alcohol was burning down his throat and he leaned his arm against the wall, resting his head on his arm, looking down at her.

What were they doing? Where would this lead?

He'd spent three hundred years seeking revenge, never straying from his path until he'd met Emma Swan. Slowly but surely she'd fought her way through all his defenses and now he was completely bare, not able to keep any walls up to shield his heart and soul from her.

Crouching down beside the bunk, he lifted his hand, brushing a strand of hair away from her face, his fingers caressing her cheek and she tilted her head into his touch, a contended sigh slipping over her lips and his heart jumped in his chest, his fingers starting to tremble.

Maybe revenge wasn't everything. Maybe she had given him another reason to live. Maybe it was time to reconsider what his life had become. Maybe it was time to give up on his revenge. Maybe it was time to start over.

A new beginning.

With her.

* * *

**Okay, brace yourself. Because you won't like the next chapter. You won't like it at all. But remember, I'm a die hard Captain Swan shipper. So they will have their happy end. **

**We get CS scenes tonight and I'm soooooo excited! We are gonna drown in feels. But we don't want it any other way, do we? :-)**


	7. Chapter 7

**Remember the author's note at the end of the last chapter? You won't like this chapter very much and it will hurt but it needed to be written. It was part of my plan for this story right from the beginning. So don't throw rotten tomatoes or eggs at me. ;-)**

**This chapter is dedicated to **_Angelfan984_**, my loyal reviewer, the angel (or devil) sitting on my shoulder who reminds me of stories I've neglected for too long. So if you want to throw something at me after reading this chapter ... aim for her on my shoulder. :-)**

**Believe me, my heart was bleeding while writing this. I wanted to slap Emma for putting me through this. Yes, the characters take me and my muse hostage from time to time. Well, it just happens when you try to put yourself in the character's shoes. So you might want to blame Emma for this chapter. :-)**

* * *

**Chapter 7**

She'd sneaked out of his cabin. Again.

Pulling out her phone, she typed a quick text to Mary Margaret, asking her if she could bring Henry to school. Leaning against a street lamp she waited for the peep telling her that she got a text massage and she breathed out a sigh of relief as she read the message. Her mother would take care of Henry. Now she could seek out the solitude she needed. Picking up her pace, she went into the woods, walking briskly, knowing her destination. The highest point of Storybrooke.

She knew she needed to give herself the time to think about what was really going on between Killian and her. She needed to take a closer look at her feelings. She needed to figure out what she really wanted.

When she reached the top of the hill she was slightly out of breath but the view was worth the exertion. Stepping forward to the edge, she stared down at the town. It was still so early in the morning that wafts of mist were wafting around the houses, swirling through the trees and burying her hands in the pockets of her jacket, she hunched her shoulders against the cold wind, her eyes falling on the mast of his ship that jutted out of the mist, making it look like one of those ghost ships in horror movies.

Inhaling a deep breath, her shoulders relaxed a little as the sun behind her started to warm her body. The beauty and silence of the place calming her nerves.

She had to face the facts. Her body wanted him with a desperation that still surprised her. But it wasn't only her body who longed for him. She knew life and death situations tended to let you say things you wouldn't say under normal circumstances but they also brought feelings to the surface that were buried so deep that you didn't realize that they were even there and when that happened you shouldn't ignore them.

That was one of the reasons she was up here this early in the morning. She needed to think. Her feelings for him were growing stronger with each passing day and soon she wouldn't be able to turn her back on him. The question now was if she wanted to turn her back on him.

She was still reluctant to open up to him completely, the wounds on her heart still not fully healed. Love could hurt. Love could hurt deeply. Trusting someone could always backfire. She'd learned that the hard way.

Sure, Neal was back in her life again and he'd tried to explain to her why he'd abandoned her all those years ago and even though the rational part of her could understand why he did what he did, the emotional part of her, the part of her where she was still this seventeen year old girl who just got thrown into prison for a crime she didn't commit … this part of her was still pissed at hell. He'd betrayed her.

As if her thoughts had somehow lured him to this place, Emma suddenly heard his voice behind her. "I knew I might find you here. You always loved to clear your mind by coming to the highest point available. Some things never change."

"Things do change." Emma said quietly, turning around to him. "I'm not seventeen anymore, Neal."

"I know."

"What do you want, Neal?"

"I came up here because it's almost impossible to get you alone. Someone is always around you and at night you seem to just disappear but I need to talk to you. I have to tell you something important."

"Can't wait to hear it." Emma replied, not able to keep the sarcastic tone out of her voice.

"I had some time to think about all of this … this mess and … I broke up with Tamara."

"Good for you." Emma said, wondering why he would tell her that. She didn't even care a little bit.

"I still love you, Emma." Emma actually startled upon hearing his confession, a part of her drinking it in while another part of her just wanted to scoff it off but he wasn't finished yet. "I didn't want to leave you behind. But I had no choice. I love you, Emma. You took me completely by surprise when I saw you in Manhattan. After all those years. And then I learned about Henry and … I lost my family way too soon and I know you've just found yours a year ago so you know what I'm talking about so … this might seem to come completely out of the blue but I think we deserve another chance, Emma. We can make it work. I know we can."

Emma suppressed the urge to tap her foot impatiently on the ground. She just wanted him to get to the point. But before she could urge him on, he suddenly lowered himself on one knee and reached into his pocket, pulling out a velvet box and snapping it open he turned it around, showing Emma the sparkling ring inside before he said quietly. "Will you marry me, Emma Swan?"

Emma already opened her mouth to ask him if he'd smoked some hallucinogen substance but then she closed it before saying anything, watching him warily. Maybe this was the right thing to do. It would make Henry happy to have his father and mother back together again and as she stared at Neal she realized that her feelings for him weren't the same anymore. She still loved him but not in the all-consuming kind of way, not the kind of love she felt for a certain pirate.

Neal was safe. She almost laughed out loud when the thought settled in. It was true tough. He was safe. He would never be able to make her love him with all her heart again. He'd hurt her too much the first time around. She would never let him really in again. But this was the less scary way.

And throwing a last look over her shoulder, her eyes wiping over the silhouette of Killian's ship in the distance, she made a decision. She would choose the safer way. She would choose the easier way. She was tired of fighting. She was tired of feeling too much. Maybe it was time to just settle down for the second best and she looked down at Neal kneeling in front of her and decided right then and there that she would be better off to just close off her heart completely.

"Yes." Emma said, clearing her throat before she added. "I'll marry you."

~K&E~

She needed to see him. She needed to see him one last time. She knew it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to him. But she just couldn't help it. She needed one last time with him.

Entering his cabin without even knocking she froze in place as she saw him sitting at his desk, his hair all rumpled, his chin propped up on his hook while he studied some papers.

She couldn't do it. How could she marry another man? Only looking at Killian made her body and heart ache. But hadn't this been the reason she said yes to Neal? If you weren't in love your heart would be safe. It couldn't be hurt. At least not in a devastating way. The person might be still able to hurt you but you would recover from it. But if your heart was fully in it … she didn't think she would survive it if her heart would be broken one more time. There was just so much a person could endure.

His head had swirled around the moment he heard the door open and he'd pushed himself off the chair and walked slowly towards her, a grin spreading out on his face as he was closing in on her.

"I didn't expect your company ton..." His sentence was cut off as her lips crashed on his, her tongue darting aggressively into his mouth and she shoved him backwards, his back hitting the wall with such force that it knocked the breath out of him.

"I need you, Killian." Emma whispered against his lips, her fingers gripping his shirt and yanking it out of his pants, her hands roaming frantically over his taut muscles while she kissed him so hungrily that his scruff set her skin on fire. But she didn't care. She needed him. Desperately.

"Emma? Love?" Killian pushed her away gently, searching her face and she knew if he would look any closer he would immediately notice that something was wrong but she didn't want him to question it right now. She couldn't tell him. Not now.

Emma took a step back, choosing the one action she knew would distract him enough to stop asking any questions. She pulled off her jacket, just let it slip to the ground, her hands immediately reaching for the buttons of her blouse and she opened the first two before she just pulled it over her head. Her eyes never left his as she opened her belt, lowering the zipper slowly before she pushed her pants down and stepped out of them.

"I want you, pirate." Emma said huskily, wording her next words deliberately like a challenge. She wanted to make sure that he would not stand a chance to resist her coaxing. "So, do you wanna talk or do you wanna spend the time with more enjoyable activities?"

A dangerous glint flashed over his eyes and he rushed towards her, hauling her against his body, his mouth searching hers, his kiss turning almost violent as he pushed her back towards the bed.

That was exactly what she wanted. She wanted to get lost in passion, in hunger. She knew it was wrong. She knew it was selfish to have sex with him knowing that she would have to leave him for good tomorrow. That she had to leave him and could never come back. She knew all that. She knew that he would consider it a betrayal when she would tell him and for one second she hesitated. For one second she wanted to push him back but then his hand slipped under her panties and she was lost in the sensations his fingers were shooting through her body.

She just stopped thinking at all, letting her body take over. A shiver rushing over her as they were finally naked and he settled between her legs, pushing slowly into her and Emma arched her back, trusting her hips upwards, drawing him in and closing her eyes, she relished the feeling of their connection, never wanted it to end, wanted to stay in this moment forever where nothing mattered except their bodies slamming together, searching for the release.

Her throat closed up, her chest constricted as he pushed her closer and closer to the edge and as his hand reached between their bodies it only needed one flick of his finger to made her come and as her walls clenched around him tightly, the sobs rising up in her chest threatened to suffocate her, her fingers digging into his back as he spilled his release into her and for a shocking moment she wished for a miracle, wished that this night would give her more than the fleeting throws of passion, that he had given her something more of him, a part of him.

She was still coming down from her high but this thought sobered her up immediately. There was no way that she just wished for a fleeting moment that he had planted his seed in her.

What was wrong with her?

She had made a choice. A choice against the man who was currently still buried in her. A sudden wave of disgust washed over her and she hated herself for what she'd just done. She'd used him. For her own satisfaction. Knowing damn well that what she needed to tell him would hurt him.

Emma struggled with keeping the tears down, almost not noticing that he slipped out of her and rolled down from her. His arm was wrapped around her waist and his lips ghosted over her shoulder, his fingers drawing slow circles over her stomach and Emma just couldn't take it any longer and slapped his hand away, scrambling out of the bed as fast as possible.

Her hands were shaking as she reached for her clothes and she could hear him shuffling behind her but she didn't look back. Out of the corner of her eye she could see him reaching for his pants and she knew she couldn't just storm out without talking to him. He'd put on his pants for a reason. He was ready for a confrontation.

She admired his strength to stay quiet as long as she still put on her clothes. He waited her out and his silence freaked her out more than anything. Shrugging into her jacket, she eventually turned around to him but she was still not able to look into his eyes and he stepped closer, his fingers cupping her chin and pulling it up, forcing her to make eye contact with him.

"What's wrong, love?"

"Nothing." Emma replied with a slightly shaking voice.

"So you just assaulted me for the fun of it?" Killian asked, raising one eye brow. "Don't get me wrong. It's fine by me. You can assault me any time you wish. But I know you pretty well by now, Swan. Something was different tonight. So tell me … what's on your mind?"

One look into his eyes told her that he wouldn't let her go until he got his answer and she steeled herself as she took in a deep breath before she rushed out the words she knew he needed to hear. "I'm getting married. To Neal."

She felt his fingers tightening around her chin, the slightly cocky glint in his eyes turning into a look that chilled her to her bones. She knew he would never hurt her but the look in his eyes shot a cold shiver down her spine and she couldn't hold back the sigh of relief that slipped over her lips as he stepped back, turning his back on her. But a moment later his voice sliced through the air, the venom in it hitting her square in the chest.

"So you have another fuck with the pirate?" He swirled around to her, his eyes blazing with fury. "Because you know he can never give it to you as good as I give it to you. You know you crave it, Swan. I know you want me. You'd just proved that. But I'm not going to be your fuck buddy. If he can't satisfy you … your bad."

"You should really stop watching cable shows. It makes your already foul language even fouler." Emma replied quietly, shocked about his outburst, though she should have expected something like this. After all he was a very passionate man.

"Foul language?" Killian snapped, his voice almost collapsing over the words and he closed the gap between them, pushing her against the wall, placing his hook right beside her face while he pressed his hand against the wooden panel on the other side, effectively caging her in. "You were the one who crawled into my bed, knowing that you're promised to another man. You've bested me before but this might be your masterpiece."

She wanted to reach up and smooth the angry fold between his brows, she wanted to caress his cheek and kiss the fury away, she wanted to tell him that he was so much more than just amazing sex for her. But she'd decided to do the right thing. For Henry. She'd decided to take the path that would be less risky. Because her heart wasn't in it. She wouldn't be in danger of getting her heart broken again. Maybe it was the coward's way out and she'd never acted cowardly in her whole life but the man towering in front of her, caging her in, made her feel too much and for the first time in her life Emma chose to run instead of fight. Because she wouldn't survive it if she would lose this fight. She wouldn't survive it if she would lose him after giving him her whole heart. It was just self-preservation.

She forced herself to take her gaze away from his heaving chest in front of her eyes and lifting her gaze she stared up into his storm-filled eyes, biting her tongue to keep the sob that was building in her chest from escaping. Placing her hand against his chest she pushed him back gently and slipped out of under his arm and walked towards the door.

As she reached for the doorknob her hand trembled so much that she was hardly able to grab it and she turned her head, looking back at him one last time. He wasn't facing her, his whole body tense and she whispered. "I'm sorry. I really am. I'm gonna miss you, Killian. And not only the sex."

Killian stood frozen to the spot, waiting until he could be sure that she'd left his ship before he punched his fist into the wall, welcoming the pain that rushed through his arm, hitting the wall over and over again until his knuckles were red with blood. It had happened again. He'd lost his heart to another woman and like the first time his heart got crushed. Milah had been ripped from his side by Rumpelstiltskin but Emma had decided to leave him willingly. He didn't know what hurt most. Loving someone and watching them die in your arms or loving someone who didn't love you back. He knew he hadn't the right to feel betrayed but he did. They never talked about their feelings and apparently she wasn't feeling the same way he did.

But he was in love with her and she might not have the ability to literally rip his heart out but she had chosen another man. She could have just ripped his heart out and crushed it because losing her felt like his heart had just jumped out of his chest and followed her as she'd left him.

He was not good enough for her. He never had been. He never would be.

* * *

**This was really hard to write. That's probably the reason why it took me so long to get this update out. But the next chapter is already half written. I wrote it a few weeks ago, knowing that I had to write this chapter first and already dreading it back then. But it's done now and it's the lowest point of this story. We are closing in on the happy end. :-)**


	8. Chapter 8

**I told you that it's going to get better, right? I'm not sure we are there yet because this chapter will hurt but in a completely different way than the last one.**

* * *

**Chapter 8**

Three days later Emma was sitting at the kitchen counter, her hands were wrapped around her coffee mug as she tried to listen to Mary Margaret who was telling a story about one of her kids from school. But she couldn't pay attention to her words for more than a few seconds.

She had thought making the decision and telling him would be the hardest part and that it would get better, easier, afterwards. She was wrong. She had earned surprised looks by David and Mary Margaret as she'd told them about the upcoming wedding, could see how they struggled for a second, David even opening his mouth but then he'd just clapped it shut again, pulling her into a slightly awkward hug.

They didn't question her decision and a part of her was relieved that they didn't, but another part of her had wished they would have at least asked her if she was sure. Because the more time went by the more she started to question her own decision.

She missed him. She missed him so much that it hurt. She was dreaming of him every night. Waking up with a start, her breathing erratic. Every single dream was about them making love, his eyes boring into hers while he was taking her with deep thrusts. But every single time his face suddenly turned into the angry mask she had seen when she'd told him about Neal and she jerked out of sleep, her whole body trembling, her heart beating in a wild staccato as if it wanted to jump out of her chest.

Was she completely insane now? She had agreed to marry Neal. The man who had betrayed her. How could she have said yes to his proposal? Her fingers tightened around the coffee mug, the hot liquid burning through the ceramic surface, almost scalding her hands but she didn't pull them away, welcoming the slight pain.

Neal had asked if he could be the one who told Henry the good news and the moment she'd said yes to his proposal a numbness had fallen over her body and she'd just agreed, accompanying him back to their apartment where he had told Henry who had seemed to be ecstatic to hear the news. She had given him a fake smile, hoping her inner struggle wasn't visible. She had been able to make everyone believe that she was happy about the proposal until she had been alone in her room, until a burning desire to see him one last time overwhelmed her and she'd just rushed out of the apartment and to his ship, to spend one last night with him.

What she had done was horrible. Just horrible. How could she do this to him? How could she hurt him like this? She knew exactly what it felt like. She knew. And she did it anyway.

Her grip tightened even more, her knuckles turning white as she stared down at the counter, self-loathing churning through her body.

"Emma? Are you okay?"

She lifted her head slowly, meeting her parents eyes and suddenly her throat closed up, making it unable for her to say anything. She wanted to shout that nothing was okay. That she'd made a horrible mistake. That she'd hurt the man she was in love with. She wanted to scream until her voice would give up. She wanted to punch her fist into a concrete wall, wanted to hurt herself for being so damn stupid.

"Emma?"

Emma raised one hand, shrugging her shoulders helplessly, everything seemed to just keep crashing down on her but before she could slip into a full-blown panic attack Henry's voice behind her pulled her back and she turned around slowly, focusing on her son standing right in front of her.

"Mom, I need to talk to you."

"We'll leave you alone." Mary Margaret said, putting her mug on the counter and grabbing David's arm to pull him away.

"No, you can stay. You should hear it, too." Henry stopped them and they both stepped back to the counter, looking at him questioningly and Henry elaborated. "Because I think you should have been the ones who should have told her what I'm about to tell her. You are her parents. Her happiness should be standing above all else. Like she puts my happiness before her own. But I'm not gonna let her do it."

"What are you talking about, Henry?" Emma asked quietly, surprised by the determination in his voice.

"Don't marry him, Mom." Henry said without preamble, making her jerk back in surprise.

"What?"

"Don't do it. I know you are only doing it because you think it's the right thing to do. You only agreed because of me. But you don't have to. I know you don't love him."

"That's not true. I do love him." Emma croaked out, feeling the irrational need to reassure him that she did love his father because in a certain way she did.

"But you are not in love with him." Henry said urgently. "Not like Grams and Grandpa. I know they are fairy tale characters and fairy tales are supposed to end with a happily ever after. But who says it can't happen in real life? They actually fell in love twice. Once in the Enchanted Forest and once here, in Storybrooke."

"Where are you going with this, kid?"

"I know you've been hurt. And Dad was one of those persons who hurt you." Henry said softly and Emma could only stare at him. She hadn't been aware that he knew about this part of her and Neal's past but apparently he'd found out somehow. "But that doesn't mean that you have to stop trying. Real love is worth fighting for. Why did you give up?"

"I think you've lost me, Henry."

"You can't marry Dad. He isn't the one for you. He isn't your true love. Your heart belongs to someone else."

"And who do you think this someone is?"

"Killian. You are in love with Captain Hook."

"No, I'm not." Emma snapped, wondering why she denied what was so plainly obvious. She'd already accepted it herself that she was in love with him and she didn't know why she refused to say it out loud.

"Yes, you are. I know it seems insane. I know it's weird. You are in love with a man who once loved my grandmother. But nothing is normal here in Storybrooke. Our lives are not normal. Look at Grams and Grandpa. They are your parents and they are the same age than you are. But Mom, you believed once and lifted the curse. You saved all of them. Why don't you want to believe your own heart? I've seen how he is looking at you, Mom."

"And how is he looking at me?"

"Like Gramps looks at Grandma. I know you're scared. But you don't have to be. He loves you, too."

"Henry is right."

"What?" Emma shouted, her head swiveling around to her mother.

"I saw it, too." David said quietly and Emma's jaw actually dropped open upon hearing his words.

"You hate him, David."

"Hate is a little bit too harsh of a word. I'm not very fond of him. That's true. Because I know he is the only one who can really hurt you. Ever since you started …" David's eyes flickered to Henry and he gulped down the rest of the sentence, taking in a deep breath before he continued, his eyes focusing back on Emma. "I watched him. And Henry is right. I didn't want to see it. I didn't want to admit it. But he is right. Hook looks at you like I look at Snow."

"No, you're mistaken." Emma whispered.

"No, Emma." David said firmly. "I know how a man in love looks like. He loves you."

"God, my life is a mess." Emma groaned, burying her face in her hands.

"Go get him."

"I don't think he wants me. Not after …" Emma trailed off, biting her lip before she continued. "He was furious the last time I saw him. When I told him that I will marry Neal."

"What did you expect?" Mary Margaret asked. "That he would be enthralled that you are going to marry another man? His reaction should be the proof you apparently need."

"What proof?"

"If he wouldn't be in love with you, he wouldn't have cared. It wouldn't have affected him at all."

"I've ruined everything, haven't I?" Emma said quietly.

"No. If he is the one. He will forgive you." Mary Margaret told her, pulling her up from the bar stool and pushing her towards the door. She looked back at them, unsure what to do next but then Henry rushed towards her, wrapping his arms around her and hugging her tightly before he released her and shoved her towards the door.

"Go, Mom."

"But … he is a terrible father figure." Emma told him.

"What are you talking about?" Henry said, a big smile erupting on his face. "He is a pirate. How cool is that?"

"I love you, Henry." Emma leaned down, pressing a kiss against his forehead.

"I love you, too. I want you to be happy and he will make you happy."

~K&E~

He would have given up his revenge for her. But it didn't matter now anyway. He was ready to die or kill him. He had sent Rumplestiltskin a message, telling him to meet him outside of town. He'd told him it was time to finish it. Once and for all.

He knew he didn't really have a chance against the Dark One's magic, that challenging him was suicide. But he didn't care. He was tired. Tired of living. Tired of getting his heart ripped out over and over again. It was time. Time to end his miserable life.

As he heard rustling to his left he turned around slowly, watching the man he had hated for the last three hundred years step into the clearing. This was it. The final showdown. He'd waited long enough for it to happen. Today he would be reunited with Milah.

But it wasn't Milah's image that popped up in his brain. He didn't see her. All he could see was Emma and a low growl rumpled through his chest as he took the image and shoved it back into a dark corner of his brain. He would not think of her. She had chosen another man, she was lost for him and there was only one way left for him to go.

~K&E~

She couldn't find him. He wasn't on board of the Jolly Roger and nowhere in town and a sudden flush of dread went through her as she questioned for the first time why he was still here. In Storybrooke. There could be only one reason. His revenge. He stayed because he wasn't finished with Rumpelstiltskin yet. His archnemesis was still alive.

"Oh my God!" Emma mumbled as the implications hit her hard. He would challenge Gold. But would he be so stupid to go up against him knowing that he had no chance against his magic? His face contorted into an angry mask flitted over her closed eyelids and she hissed out a breath.

"Oh my God! No! Please, no!" She only earned curious glances from David and Mary Margaret as she charged into the direction of Gold's shop, not giving them any explanation, sending silent prayers skywards that she wouldn't be too late.

She couldn't lose him. She just couldn't. If he'd die today it would be her fault. Hers alone. She would never forgive herself if anything happened to him. She had pushed him away. She had let him think he wasn't important to her, that she wasn't in love with him. If he loved her as much as she loved him she had broken his heart into a million pieces by telling him that she would marry Neal. She needed to find him. She needed to find him before he would throw his life away.

She yanked the door to the shop open, stumbling into it, still trying to catch her breath as Neal walked into the room. She rushed towards him, her hands grabbing his shirt and yanking him forward as she asked. "Neal, where is your Dad?"

"He left about ten minutes ago, saying something about having to take care of some old business." Neal said, looking down at her slightly stunned.

"He is after Kill … he is meeting Hook. We need to stop them." Emma told him frantically. "Do you have any idea where your father went?"

"No, I ..." Neal started but stopped abruptly. "Wait a sec. I think he got a message. Let me just fetch it."

Emma was rocking back and forth on her feet, waiting impatiently for Neal to come back. She almost ripped the paper apart as he showed up a few seconds later, her eyes flitting over the message. She knew that place and without giving it a second thought she rushed towards the door.

"Emma, what is this all about?" Neal's question stopped her dead in her tracks and she turned around, staring at the man she had agreed to marry.

"Neal, I ... we ..." She knew she owed him an explanation, he was still her fiancé but she just had no time for it. Not now.

"Go Mom, I'll explain it to Dad." Henry suddenly appeared beside her, shoving her towards the door. "Go!"

~K&E~

Killian was kneeling on the ground, pain ripping through his body as another streak of magic was hitting him. As the streak of magic suddenly stopped he fell forward, hardly able to keep himself from hitting the ground face first. Gritting his teeth, he pushed himself slowly up, shifting his body so that he could look at his opponent, hissing out. "Just kill me already."

"You don't deserve to die through magic." Rumpelstiltskin replied, reaching into his pocket and pulling a gun out of it. "Remember this one? It's the weapon you used to shoot Belle with."

"Let's just get it over with." Killian said hoarsely, pulling a knee under his body and standing up shakily, he stretched out his arms to give him a better target. "I'm ready to die. You are actually doing me a favor."

Killian stared directly into his eyes as he raised the gun and pointed it at him. He closed his eyes, wondering if he would feel the killing shot or if he would just be gone without feeling anything. He hoped it would end immediately. But maybe he deserved to die slowly. Maybe he didn't deserve to go quickly. But either way it would be over.

Emma stumbled out into the clearing and it took her only a millisecond to take in the scenery in front of her and without even thinking she jumped, throwing herself in the line of the weapon, a sharp pain shooting through her as the bullet pierced its way through her chest. She could actually feel it hitting a rib before it went out of her body on the other side and for a few seconds she stared at the red stain on her white blouse that grew bigger and bigger before her legs suddenly gave out under her.

But she didn't hit the ground as she was expecting. Strong arms were catching her, pulling her closer and she willed herself to look up, her whole body feeling numb as she saw his startling blue eyes staring down at her. Her arm felt like lead as she lifted her hand with quite some effort, her fingers brushing over his cheek.

"I'm sorry, Killian. I'm so sorry that I hurt you." Her tongue felt too big for her mouth but she knew she had to tell him the most important thing. He needed to know. "I love you, Killian. I love you."

"No, no! Emma, please! You can't leave me. Noooo!" The horror of the situation overwhelmed him, an inhuman sound ripping through his throat as he saw the light in her eyes flicker. "I love you. Gods, I love you. Please stay with me."

Her eyes fluttered shut and he leaned down, pressing a desperate kiss against her lips, hoping for a miracle but nothing happened.

"It's not a curse, Hook." David said slowly and Killian looked up at him for a second, wondering where he suddenly came from. Mary Margaret was standing right beside her husband, staring completely motionless down at them.

His eyes returned to Emma, the paleness of her skin tearing his heart apart. "Nooo! Emma, no! You can't die." Clutching her to his chest, he tightened his arms around her lifeless body, feeling silent tears streaming down his cheeks.

"It should work." He mumbled into her hair, leaning down again, his lips touching hers once again, his whole body stiff, waiting for her to respond. But she didn't move. "True love's kiss. It should work."

He couldn't believe it. She was gone. He was the one who should have died today. The bullet was meant to kill him. Not her. His eyes flickered to his enemy, registering the shocked expression on his face and he noticed another man standing right beside him. Baelfire.

If he hadn't asked Emma to marry him nothing of this would have happened. He expected to feel rage, he expected to feel anger. He expected that the urge to avenge her death would rush through him. But he couldn't feel anything. He just felt empty.

She was gone. He had lost her. And he was still here. Alone. Again.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

It couldn't be. This was not happening. Not again.

He stared down at her, waiting for her to open her eyes. She could not leave him alone here. She just couldn't.

He saw a shadow falling over her face as Mary Margaret kneeled beside him, her fingers shaking as she reached for her daughter's throat, pressing her fingers against the point where Emma's pulse should beat and for a second hope rose up in his chest. He hadn't checked her pulse, maybe she wasn't dead. But then Mary Margaret's shoulders sagged, silent tears running down her cheeks as she kept her gaze glued to Emma's face.

And he could swear he could hear his heart break. She was gone. Really gone.

Angry voices made his head snap up and he looked over to Rumpelstiltskin, seeing David grabbing his coat and shaking him as he shouted right into his face. "Gold, bring her back! Do something!"

"I can't bring someone back from the dead. Even dark magic has its limits."

Killian slipped his arms out of under Emma's body, laying her carefully on the ground and leaning down he brushed another kiss over her cold lips, whispering hoarsely. "I love you, Emma. I will always love you."

He knew what he needed to do. He stood up slowly, his eyes still on Emma and his hand closed into a fist beside his body as he stared down at her for a few seconds before he straightened and walked towards the group that was standing on the other side of the clearing.

David actually took a few steps back as he saw Killian approaching, something about the other man's posture making him stop his shouting. It took David a moment until he realized why an uneasy feeling was washing over him. It was the look in Hook's eyes. No passion, no hate, no anger. His eyes were dead. It seemed that all life had vanished out of him, even his movements seemed to be like those of a robot.

Killian stepped closer, his gaze completely fixated on his enemy and when he reached him he grabbed Rumplestiltskin's hand, the one that was still holding the gun and yanking it upwards he forced him to press it against his chest, his voice ice cold, void of any emotion as he addressed him.

"Finish it. You owe me that. Twice you've killed women I loved. Murdered them in front of my eyes. It's time you stop being a coward and actually kill the one you wanted to kill all along. You hate me. So just pull the trigger, you bloody bastard, and kill me already."

Once again he waited, waited for the bullet that would end his life. But once again it didn't come and he reached for the weapon, intending to rip it out of Rumpelstiltskin's hand and just pull the trigger himself.

"Hook!" Mary Margaret grabbed his arm, yanking him back. "She wouldn't want this! She died to save your life."

"I'm not worth saving." Killian snapped back, struggling against her firm grip.

"She thought otherwise." Mary Margaret almost yelled before her voice turned soft as he stared at her, his lost look cutting straight through her heart. "She loved you, Killian. She really did. She couldn't let you die. She couldn't have gone on with her life knowing that your death was her fault."

"It wouldn't have been her fault."

"Would you have gone after Gold if she hadn't told you that she was marrying Neal, if she had told you that you are the one she is in love with?"

Killian averted his gaze to the ground without giving her an answer but she didn't need him to say it out loud. She saw the answer written all over his face. But when he looked up again and met her gaze the desperation clouding his eyes made her stumble back a step.

"I can't either."

"What do you mean?"

"It's … I … it's my fault." Mary Margaret had to strain her ears to even understand him, his voice was so low that she needed to tilt her head to hear his whispered words. "She is dead because of me and I can't … I can't live without her. I challenged Gold because I thought I've lost her. I wanted her to be happy and if another man could give her the happiness she deserves I didn't want to stand in her way."

"Oh Killian!"

"Could you live without him?" Killian asked, nodding his head towards David who'd stepped back to Emma's body.

"I don't know." Mary Margaret said slowly, watching her husband, her heart aching for him as she saw the devastated look on his face. She would give herself time to grieve but right now she needed to keep herself together. Her gaze went back to the pirate who was standing beside her and she lifted her hand, touching his arm to get his attention. "There are still people here who need me. I would try to live for them even if it would mean I needed to rip my heart out to do so."

"But there is no one for me. No one cares if I live or die. She …" Killian gulped hard, the grief about her death almost suffocating him. "Emma was the only one who cared and now no one gives a damn."

"That's not true." Mary Margaret said firmly. "I do."

"What?" Killian's voice rose with surprise. "Why?"

"Because my daughter loved you." Mary Margaret replied. "And I'm not the only one. Henry wants to get to know you better, too."

"He does?"

"Of course. You are a pirate, Hook." Mary Margaret said. "There is hardly anything more fascinating to a child."

"But I can't imagine a life without her. I wanted to die because she didn't choose me."

"But she did choose you and she wanted you to be in Henry's life."

"Snow! Hook!"

The urgency in David's voice made both their heads snap in his direction. He was kneeling beside Emma, his face full of wonder as he stared down at his daughter's body and it took Killian a few seconds until he actually processed what his eyes were seeing.

The skin directly above Emma's heart was glimmering in a deep red and he stumbled forwards, falling down on his knees beside her body, his eyes darting from her chest to her eyes, hoping for the impossible. Hoping for a wonder.

The red glimmer was spreading out over her body and suddenly her chest rose as she was taking in a deep breath and a second later her eyes fluttered open, her gaze unfocused for only a brief moment before her eyes zeroed in on his face.

"Killian." Emma's voice was barely audible but her face lit up, color coming back into her cheeks as she tilted her head, a soft smile curling up her lips. "I wasn't too late."

"You are really alive?" Killian whispered. "I'm not dreaming?"

"No, you are not dreaming." Emma said softly, raising a shaking hand, brushing a tear away from his cheek. "Are those for me?"

"I love you. Gods, Emma. I love you so much."

"I'm so sorry, Killian. I'm so sorry."

"It doesn't matter. Not anymore. You …" His voice broke, the emotions rushing through him almost too much to bear. "You didn't leave me."

"I couldn't leave you. I almost screwed everything up because I let my fears overwhelm me. But I wasn't willing to lose you when I've just found you." Her hand ghosted over his cheek, her fingers brushing over his lips and her mouth turned up into a huge grin as she added. "It's the stupidest thing I've ever done in my whole life when I went and fell in love with you. But I couldn't help it. It just happened."

They could hear voices around them, Emma could feel fingers brushing over her hair, could hear her mother and father telling her how happy they were that she was alive but Emma didn't pay them any attention. Her eyes never left his, her fingers stayed intertwined with his and even when the ambulance arrived and she was lifted onto a gurney she refused to let go of him, too afraid that he would leave her alone if she would let go of his hand.

~K&E~

Eventually she had to let go of him as Dr. Whale had shouted orders, a nurse taking her to radiology to check for internal injuries. She was prodded and poked but no one was actually surprised about the fact that the entry and exit wound of the bullet were already healed, the only reminder round scars on her skin. After all they were in Storybrooke. Stranger things had happened here, in this town, over the last two years. No one paid her miraculous wound healing much attention.

When they'd brought her back into her room Emma had felt so exhausted that she'd immediately fallen asleep even though she had tried to stay awake until she had seen Killian but her body had apparently needed sleep and the drugs they'd pushed into her systems had done the rest.

As she woke up her eyes immediately fell on the two figures on the couch beside her bed. Killian's head was resting on the backrest, his legs sprawled out in front of him, his arm was wrapped firmly around the shoulders of her son who slept with his head on Killian's leg. The picture in front of her made her smile and she shifted slightly to lay on her side, enjoying to watch them sleep for another few minutes until Henry began to stir in Killian's arms and he opened his eyes slowly. But the moment he saw her awake, he'd jumped up from the couch and rushed over to the bed, scrambling onto it, crushing into her side.

"You are awake!" He cried, burying his face into the crook of her neck for a second before he leaned back. "I knew you belong together. True love's kiss. It saved you. He saved you."

Her eyes went to Killian who'd woken up the moment Henry had jumped from the couch, hoping for an explanation but he just shrugged his shoulders and Emma looked back at her son, realizing that she needed to wait until later to ask Killian why Henry thought she'd come back to life because of true love's kiss.

But fortunately Henry couldn't stay still for long and only a few minutes later he jumped down from her bed and raced to the door, shouting over his shoulder. "I need to tell Dad. I promised to tell him the moment you wake up."

"This kid is just a hopeless romantic and he is only twelve." Emma shook her head, not able to keep the smile of her face.

As her eyes returned to him she furrowed her brows, watching him intently, waiting for him to speak and he inhaled a deep breath, pushing the words out on one breath. "We decided not to tell him the whole story. It's easier for him that way."

Emma just nodded, understanding why they'd chosen to tell Henry only part of the truth. But she could see Killian shifting nervously on the couch, his gaze averted to the ground and suddenly it hit her how he might feel about the whole thing.

"Killian?" Emma waited until he looked up again before she continued. "I could hear you."

"Hear what?"

"You were right. It should have worked." Emma replied but Killian just stared confused up at her and she added softly. "True love's kiss. The magic inside me probably screwed it up. It was already healing me. It didn't work because I didn't need it."

"It doesn't matter how you ..." Killian started to speak, his gaze back on the ground in front of his feet but Emma just interrupted him.

"Killian, look at me!" The sharpness of her voice made him jerk his head up and she softened her voice before she continued. "This … we … it's real. What we have … it's special. You know that, right?"

He didn't answer her immediately and Emma started to get nervous, fearing that he might have had second thoughts now after everything had calmed down. That he might not believe her. That he might not be willing to forgive her.

She already wanted to jump out of the bed to convince him that her feelings for him were true as he leaned forward, putting his arms on his knees and a lopsided smile tilted up his mouth as he said softly. "I know. We are connected. Kindred spirits, right?"

"Yeah." Emma leaned back, her body relaxing with relief. "Kindred spirits."

A knock on the door surprised them both and their heads swiveled around as Neal stepped into the room. Emma hadn't given him much thought over the last few hours, so many other things had happened that she had completely forgotten that she was actually still engaged to him.

Her eyes shot back to Killian, seeing the tense expression on his face as he stared at Neal before his gaze went back to her and she gave him a smile, hoping for it to be reassuring. "I need to talk to him."

She saw him stiffen for a second but then he nodded sharply and pushed himself up from the couch, walking slowly towards the door. Emma followed him with her gaze, her eyes stopping on the man waiting in the doorway. The man who had betrayed her all those years ago, her first love, the father of her child.

Killian stopped directly beside Neal, both men staring intently at each other and Emma held her breath, hoping they wouldn't start a brawl in the middle of the hospital but something must have passed between them because Killian's body relaxed slightly before he stepped out of the room and closed the door gently behind him.

Emma hoped he knew that he had nothing to fear, she hoped that he wasn't doubting her feelings for him anymore. She'd promised herself that accepting Neal's proposal would be the last cowardly thing she had done in her life. But she owed him an explanation. It was time they had the long overdue talk. The talk they should have had twelve years ago.

She would start her new life with Killian with a clean slate. It was time to destroy the last remnants of her walls. She would get rid of them once and for all. She didn't need them anymore. A thief had forced her to put them up and it needed a pirate to tear them down. But to have a future with the pirate she needed to forgive the thief.

* * *

**Thank you so much for all the reviews! I've been away on vacation for two weeks so this update took a little longer. I'm sorry for letting you all wait for so long. This was the penultimate chapter. So, there is one chapter left and of course I need to throw some 'sappy' in. Like always! No happy end without sappiness. :-)**


End file.
